Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Like gliding backwards through porridge.

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Cat Food Comparison Commercial

Super Kitty Dinners - "Your cat will chose our delicious meals over you 9 times out of 10!"
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Commercials sometimes use scientific comparisons featuring a lab with men in white coats comparing products.

This proposed Super Kitty Dinners meal comparison plays on a cat owners desire to not be eaten by their cat once they die. (That's what happens, look it up.)

So the people in the lab make an analog of the cat owner that's has the same characteristics of the owner's dead body and places it next to a bowl of Super Kitty Dinners brand cat food and let's Fluffy into the room filming the cat's choice. I don't know how they'd make the faux corpse. Take bacon and sculpt it into human form, put a wig on it, dress it in a mumu etc. The owner watching through one way glass in the other room crosses their finger as the cat considers eating what it thinks is them or the bowl of cat food. There are ten such experiments run at once all showing in split screen. As the cat goes from mock corpse to the cat food in the bowl trying to decide, the owners jump up and down hoping beyond hope their beloved kitty choses not to eat what it thinks is their dead body. When 9 of the 10 test subject cats chose the cat food instead of the mock dead owner's body, the owners run into the room and grab their fluffy little fur balls with a loving embrace.

Then the guy in the lab coat steps in with his clipboard. "Yes folks, 9 out of 10 cats will eat Super Kitty Dinners rather than you if you die."

doctorremulac3, Jun 15 2019

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