Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Cell Phone Suit

Like a floodlight in a prison.
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Jeremiah yawned, and allowed himself to sink back into the slightly uncomfortable, turfy surface of the movie-theater chair beneath him. He had a vague notion that he wanted to go to the bathroom, but the hour of Castaway still before him was putting him into a drowsy stupor, and besides, he wasn't entirely sure if he was going to be able to free himself from the floor.

Shoveling popcorn into his mouth like a blue whale inhaling krill, he suddenly became aware of a slight vibrating sensation near his crotch. Uh-oh.

All at once, Jeremiah was covered in bright trailing neon lights which ran up and down the sleeves of his shirt, seams of his pants, and in amusing coordinated patterns o'er his chest, back, and buttocks.

Drat! He had forgotten to turn his cell phone suit off and it had been set off by an incoming call. He scrambled frantically to hit the 'disconnect' button.

Too late - dark, shadowy shapes were already beginning to arise from their seats, stalking menacingly towards Jeremiah, who was still, unfortunately, covered in a fluctuating multicolored glow. Giving up, he inserted his thumb into his mouth, curled into a ball, and awaited the imminent horror that was to follow.

And I'm not talking about the last hour of Castaway.

[Update: sorry, I suppose in writing this I more or less left out the intention of the idea. The concept is merely a suit with embedded lighting that activates when your cell goes off, for novelty purposes only; the story is just for amusement. This is nothing more than an ode to eccentricity.]

Pseudonym #3, Nov 05 2004

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       So these would be required? How annoying.
Worldgineer, Nov 05 2004
  

       Required? Good lord, no. What an awful thought.   

       Just plug 'em into your cell phone. They run on their own (built in) batteries.
Pseudonym #3, Nov 05 2004
  

       What, then, is the purpose? I assumed it was to locate cellphone abusers.
Worldgineer, Nov 05 2004
  

       I remain perplexed...
wagster, Nov 05 2004
  

       so you would know who to beat to a pulp at the theatre? neat! Hi Pseud...
po, Nov 07 2004
  

       Ah, I think I understand now. At one of my places of work we have a mobile phone alarm - you can leave it at the entrance and it'll beep whenever someone goes in with a phone switched on, silent or not.
wagster, Nov 07 2004
  

       [Pseudonym], maybe you should put that bracketed remark at the TOP of the story; err . . . idea(?)
contracts, Nov 07 2004
  

       Right! Now I see entirely. Croissant.
wagster, Nov 07 2004
  
      
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