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Commercials not Solos

in pop songs
  [vote for,

I was just listening to my second favorite song ever, Dr. Love, by Kiss, and I was thinking, this solo sucks, it is making me think bad things away from which I am pleased to be jerked when the chours comes back in. And I was thinking I would much rather be listeing to almost anything, even a commercial, rather than this Ace Frehley solo. Maybe its a Paul solo. Anyway, it sucks and I would rather listen to a commercial than this shit but so what if all songs which formerly had solos were sponsored by taste mavens who would sell products inside the song. what a dastardly plan.

A network of taste mavens who compete to provide approriate commercial suggestion to users of pop songs who are in a semi hypnotized state analogous to being in love.

JesusHChrist, Sep 12 2017

Maven http://www.urbandic...fine.php?term=maven
From the Hebrew, apparently. [8th of 7, Sep 12 2017]

Chours http://en.bab.la/di...ish-romanian/chours
"Chours" is the Romanian for "Concert". Hope that helps. [hippo, Sep 12 2017]

Skip to 6:28 https://www.youtube...watch?v=sOnqjkJTMaA
Now picture Vincent Price saying "You could save up to 15% on your car insurance." [doctorremulac3, Sep 15 2017]


       So, there are a couple of Digital Underground tracks (definitely Doowutchyalike and maybe also the Humpty Dance) which include a fade out towards the end of the song (where, on a rock song, you might expect to find a guitar solo) and then a fade back in, creating a space wherein an advertisement could be placed. This was taken a little bit further by RZA on his "Bobby Digital in Stereo" album. On the track "Airwaves", RZA sez "We pause for radio station identification" and the song stops for a bit, this explicitly encouraging advertisement mid song.   

       This concludes your annual disgressory annotation dealing with 1990s rap music.
calum, Sep 12 2017

       Or, manufacturers could just change their product names to phrases from popular songs. If, in the 1970's you'd created a chocolate bar named "Scaramouch, scaramouch, will you do the Fandango?", just imagine how much free advertising you'd have got by now.
hippo, Sep 12 2017

       That would be very cost-effective.   

       Is Beelzebub still giving out free devils, do you know ? That would be a great promo gimmick. "Buy this chocolate bar, get your own personal demon ! "   

       Then again, Richard Branson's probably already thought of that.
8th of 7, Sep 12 2017

       I'm not being sarcastic, I'm not being ironic, I'm not kidding.   

       In the twelve years I've been coming to the Halfbakery, this is my absolute, hands down single favorite idea.   

       And bonus kudos for obliquely pointing out that Ace Frehley and Paul Stanley are "guitar players" not guitar players.
doctorremulac3, Sep 15 2017

       //In the twelve years I've been coming to the Halfbakery// - newbie!
hippo, Sep 15 2017

       We are glad for you, but sadly we find the idea entirely opaque and utterly incomprehensible.   

       A translation into one of your more mainstream human languages would be helpful.
8th of 7, Sep 15 2017


       Commercials Instead of Guitar and Drum Solos in Songs   

       Guitar solos usually suck so they should be remixed, and the guitar solo tracks replaced by commercial messages. Guitar solos, drum solos and bridges are "intermission" for a song, so why not monetize them?   

       We may not need more commercials, but we certainly don't need more guitar solos. Let me put it this way, would you rather replace commercials with guitar solos? Hmm. Actually, that might be kind of interesting.   

       There's an interesting example of what this might sound like in the song "Thriller" when Vincent Price does a short monologue during a breakdown at the end of the song. (See link)
doctorremulac3, Sep 15 2017

       [+] quite possibly the most evil thing I've read in awhile.
FlyingToaster, Sep 15 2017

       // I'm not being sarcastic, I'm not being ironic, I'm not kidding. In the twelve years I've been coming to the Halfbakery, this is my absolute, hands down single favorite idea. //   

       Ha ha ha! Awesome, doctorremulac3! :D   

       Here's my favorite thing by Black Flag, a radio commercial:   

       First 1 minute 50 seconds of   

       Black Flag "Crass Commercialism" https://tinyurl.com/y7bg9qse
sbowles, Sep 16 2017

       No no no no no no no no NO! I... I.,, I... here, the key is in the way gene Simmons voice breaks when he says, “you’re” that is the ticket. If you’ll notice, geneorama uses an apostrophe in the significantly middle of the word, so that you will receive at full volume, exactly how impossible it was for him to hold his asininity in that note, he couldn’t do it. It is impossible for him to care about you because he is so attractively full of himself which is exactly how you feel when you are a teen ager who has just experienced their parents attempted inconspicuous shoving of google Apple Facebook amazon Microsoft down their thoat, this the tenuous. The guitar solo is a teetering attemp to give momentum to an infinity that interestingly and tellingly refuses to give up control of the moment momentum to lesser mortals resulting in a total interesting failure of the human aspiration to achieve. Ace Frehley is just a different kind of person than Gene Simmons, there is an attractively lesser status that Ace can inhabit that gives you the feeling that you are that soloist, that you could be Ace Frehley as a sort of silent partner to the greatness of gene simmons BUT IT DOESNT FUCKING WORK ACE. He’s an asshole but he’s a genius, Ace, there is nothing you can do about it, you are just permanently and forever and for infinity, a lesser musician, not a genius, just a regular old crappy joe, taking shits in the outhouse thatvwhen youvate drunk get all over the place and get messy and you are not perfect it is ok Ace, even though your name is Ace and you should be good, you suck, and it is not your fault, it is just some kind of tucked up Rick and roll lesson that you are shit and not good and suck it up and I’m a loser baby so maybe you can have some kind of future legitimacy where you will become the super unspoken genius idiot in the far far far future Ince we get computer systems that can Change poop into gold then maybe one day that fucking solo woo have some kind of legitimacy but until hell does feeeze over and banking on your artistic ability to imagine things I hope for you that you are capable of imagining yourself as a musician because that is not the reality of the situation according to my furious and 50 year long calculations, you are an idiot and I would prefer not to have to listen to your unnanipulated guitar solos for the rest of my potentially infinitely long life. Ms Bowles. Kiss and Black Flag do not belong on the same internet’s page because they represent opposite ends of the spectrum. Gene Simmons is about self agrandization, and legitimately so as he is a genius, whereas Ace Frehley much less Black Flag is about fandom, two totally opposite ends of the spectrum. All typed on the iPhone 7. Can I get a sponsor?
JesusHChrist, Oct 11 2017

       Maybe Ace you are my sponsor.
JesusHChrist, Oct 11 2017

       Exploitative, evil. [+]
Voice, Oct 11 2017


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