Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Recalculations place it at 0.4999.

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Cool Earth

Everyone talks about the climate, but no one does anything about it
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(+1, -5)
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I'm getting really sick of all these environmentalists whining about the global warming. Ice shelf collapse this... catastrophic flooding that.... And then insisting I have to give up my SUV and stay warm during the winter with mere sweaters.

So I propose we cool earth. The main problem we have is that we are too darn close to the sun. What we need to do is trade momentum with a convenient nearby celestial body. What I propose is that we sling a bunch of superballs off the moon as the earth-moon system accelerates away from Mars in our orbit. The superballs would be targetted at Mars (ideally at a trampoline on Mars). Mars bounces the balls back to, preferrably the Moon, and the process repeats itself. In a few millenia, we'll be a couple percent farther from the sun, and Mars will be a couple percent closer.

Now, does anyone know how to convert Ceres into a superball?

pathetic, Mar 22 2002


       Does anyone know how to convert this into an idea worth keeping here?
bristolz, Mar 22 2002

       Ditch the first rather baitlicious paragraph, then spend a few minutes trying to come up with an idea to move earth that woulden't involve causing the moon to either de-orbit or attempt a re-entry?
Other than that, I can't think of anything.
Orb2069, Mar 22 2002

       Cough... conservationofmomentum... cough cough.
st3f, Mar 22 2002

       You could of course just put up a giant smoked glass window between the earth and the sun. Simply open it every now and then to stop everything freezing.
jambu, Mar 22 2002

       Ceres _is_ a superball, didn't you know?   

       Inane whatever-it-is (not an idea). Global warming is a myth anyway.
waugsqueke, Mar 22 2002

       But I WANT the earth to warm up. When the sea levels rise, that newly-ocean-front property I own in the middle of Kansas will be prime real estate, and I'll be able to retire in style. A few years after that -- after I've bilked the folks who haven't drowned or been melanoma'd to death for every scrap of their equity for cornfield-cum-beachfront timeshares, then we can talk about cooling things off enough to repurpose the Dakotas for glacial recreation.
quarterbaker, Mar 22 2002

       Exactly how cold do you want the Earth to get? You may lose a few friends considering some people already have nasty cold winters.   

       Careful what you wish for - quick fix - nuclear winter, very cold, very bad.
dag, Mar 23 2002


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