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Funny Feet Corrector

For those with funny feet
 
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I was thinking about my late grandmother the other day (it's a long story) and remembered that, apart from her only being 4feet 11inches tall and pretty much the same round, her main physical characteristic was her feet. She was a chiropodists dream. She had toes that overlapped, bunions aplenty, and had to have specially fitted shoes in her latter years. I understand that this is a fairly common complaint, especially in fashion-conscious ladies. My grandmother blamed those tight fashion shoes so prevalent in the 1920's.

Now, teeth grow out all crooked and people wear braces to correct their positioning (you can see where this is going already, can't you). After a few years of orthodentistry, people have those perfect smiles with not a tooth out of place.

Teeth grow out of jawbone. Toes have bones in them too. It should be possible to create toe correcting braces that will straighten those crooked toes. A whole new line of orthochiropody or orthopedicure is opening up before you.

PeterSilly, Jun 16 2003

"toe straightener" http://www.google.c...&btnG=Google+Search
[thumbwax, Oct 05 2004]

[link]






       the 20's ? <grin> should this be in dental? love it.   

       my funny feet make *me* laugh
po, Jun 16 2003
  

       There wasn't a Health:Feet category - Teeth only supplants an F with a T and adds an h at the end.
PeterSilly, Jun 16 2003
  

       there should be a health: feet category. I am sure there are a whole load of feet ideas just itching to be created. with your ideas about categorisation, its a good fing you aint a librarian.
po, Jun 16 2003
  

       //I am sure there are a whole load of feet ideas just itching to be created// You can get powders, you know.   

       //with your ideas about categorisation, its a good fing you aint a librarian// Just be happy it's under Health.   

       Also, ['waxy] a lot of those things are individual plastic sleeves with big pads underneath, not really what I was thinking of.
PeterSilly, Jun 16 2003
  

       How about a *bracing*, cold, foot bath?
FarmerJohn, Jun 16 2003
  

       Peter: The items on thumb's list were pretty much what came to my mind on reading your description. Did you have something else in mind?   

       //Just be happy it's under Health.// [Created new category. Feet no longer in mouth.]
st3f, Jun 16 2003
  

       that can-crusher on thumb's link looks more like what Peter is trying to achieve.
po, Jun 16 2003
  

       The problem with the ones with pads underneath is that you can only wear one at a time on each foot. Agreed, the plasticy sleeves may do the job, but just don't look gruesome enough. I was thinking of some device that you slip over the entire foot which has holes for your toes to slip in. Over time, the device can be adjusted as the digits straighten.   

       oh, and thanks to [st3f] - although I did prefer the original category for purely comedic value.
PeterSilly, Jun 16 2003
  

       Just have any 'funny' feet removed and replaced with 'perfect' prostheses.
oneoffdave, Jun 16 2003
  

       I thought this was going to be a software tool used by novice poets.
krelnik, Jun 16 2003
  

       Only the version sold by the metre [krelnik].
oneoffdave, Jun 16 2003
  

       I wore a brace on my feet when I was a toddler to correct severe toe-in (or, maybe it was toe-out). I've seen the photos. The brace was a metal bar that ran between my two shoes, keeping them parallel. Apparently, according to the numerous recountings I've had to endure over the years, I got very good at walking in the brace. I imagine that my ambulation looked much as the toy army men's did in Toy Story.
bristolz, Jun 16 2003
  

       Thoroughly Baked since before Victorian times. It's only modern podiatrists who resort to surgery on just about any excuse.
DrCurry, Jun 16 2003
  

       As a victim of these leather and steel monstrosities as a child I have to fishbone this.
oneoffdave, Jun 16 2003
  

       (((bristolz))) - how many years did you wear the device? Interesting that your memory has blotted it out, save for recollections of others.
thumbwax, Jun 16 2003
  

       those soldiers were the best characters in toy story.
po, Jun 16 2003
  

       I think for about a year and when I was a year old or so. Not at all unusual that I wouldn't remember.
bristolz, Jun 16 2003
  

       Say what?   

       foot barces?   

       Hmmmm....
DesertFox, May 12 2004
  
      
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