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Holographic Sexcapades

A potential solution to std's, unwanted babies, and a variety of other things
  (+5, -8)
(+5, -8)
  [vote for,

Sex is such a wonderful, fulfilling activity, but it is also a pervasive and sometimes destructive influence in our lives. The tension that exists between coworkers, classmates, and complete strangers is unbearable for some and distracting to most. Why has technology not yet been implemented to solve this problem? My suggestion is to use holographic, videographic, and motion capture technologies, coupled with some sort of physical apparatus, to simulate the sex experience. Sure, it sounds ridiculous, but it's really a win-win-win-win situation. First, you could download sexual episodes that would guarantee the best sex you've ever had, and that would complete your wildest fantasies. Second, you could have sex with anyone you could get a digital photograph of without intruding on their life or even having to confront them in a sexual manner. Third, it would cut down on unwanted side effects of recreational sex, like unwanted children and disease. Fourth and finally, it would radically redefine social interaction and sex roles. The first and most immmediate problem that comes to mind is that this would be prohibitively expensive, and I don't want rich people to have all the fun. If everyone who wished to use the machine was able, I cannot think of any problems that this idea would create...only a host of them that it would solve!
crackriot, Dec 30 2004


       When your maid quits, don't expect the size of the tip you left to be an issue.
reensure, Dec 30 2004

       no holographic sexcapades until after you've done your homework.
benfrost, Dec 30 2004

       THEORETICALLY, this would give new meaning to the phrase 'go (expletive) yourself'.
Dog, Dec 30 2004

       Arnold S. "The 6th Day", there was a holographic girl...correction, a virtual girl, the guy wore a virtual reality mask to "experience" her.
dentworth, Dec 30 2004

       WTCTTISITMWIBNIIWR (see help file)
krelnik, Dec 30 2004

       Presumably, once this became mainstream, the major software companies would get in on the act. I really, really, really do not want a little Microsoft Office Assistant popping up with helpful hints at critical moments.   

       Call me a reactionary luddite traditionalist if you will, but good old- fashioned pornography was good enough for my grandmother and, by golly, it's good enough for me.
Basepair, Dec 30 2004

       I'm reminded of a certain Red Dwarf episode.
spiritualized, Dec 30 2004

       which one?
po, Dec 30 2004

       i guess that zinc supplement is working for you.
mensmaximus, Dec 31 2004

       Coworker 1: "goodmorning coworker!" Coworker 2: "goodmorning coworker!" Coworker 1: "did you have sex with me last night?" Coworker 2: "I sure did! It was wondefull! Did you do me aswell?" Coworker 1: "every night and you know it, wanna try for real sometime?" Coworker 1and 2 in chorus: "naaah"
zeno, Dec 31 2004

       Count Zero (then just lowly Bobby Newmark) is philosophical about his apartment being rocketed, but must have regretted saying goodbye to the holo-porn girls he spent his teenage years growing up with.
zen_tom, Dec 31 2004

       i wish this idea was vaguely possible, but alas i will shelve it earnestly with the myriad of other juvenile fantasies that i only think about when i am naked and alone.
benfrost, Dec 31 2004


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