Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Idiot Vending Machine

A two story machine sells idiots as fast as people will buy them.
  [vote for,

You go down town on your lunch break.

You see a stand alone vending machine. Sign says "idiots for sale". Indeed, looking through a shatter proof window in a door you see an A number 1 red faced idiot. It strikes you that he looks a bit like your boss's brother. A smaller sign points up. You climb the circular stairway until you find the vending machine controls and buy yourself an idiot. You think of the fun you'll have showing up with an idiot at work. As you start to leave there is slight pop and the floor drops quickly. You look out through the shatter proof glass in the door and see your boss's brother. You start to yell and get red in the face.

You seem to be for sale.

popbottle, Oct 14 2015

Source Curiosity_2fidiot_20tax_2e
thanks [popbottle, Oct 14 2015]


       nice, other than it works on personal connections when the real world works on nameless numbers.
wjt, Oct 15 2015

       Brings to mind the very first bakery idea I ever saw, that snagged me in, and got me hooked. (MSN's site of the day, that day.) It was, "iworkwithidiots.com". I was at work at the time, with a bunch of idiots. Loved it. This idea just adds more idiots to the mixture. Not so good.
blissmiss, Oct 15 2015

       Bliss: I could propose an idiot elimination vending machine. It would suffer from having few repeat customers.   

       But even if it won a Darwin Award, I would end up with jail time.   

       Oh! Gosh! Guillotines! Beat out by the French once again.
popbottle, Oct 18 2015

       There seems to be a real market for idiots. The Darwin Awards only sells a book version, since the inspirations for the awards seem to be no longer for sale.
4and20, Oct 19 2015

       Some idiots don't last that long...they expire quickly. (This summer there was a news story about a man who tried to light fireworks off the top of his head...Dead!)
xandram, Oct 19 2015

       That wasn't one of us, was it? I wonder how we could do a roll-call, so see who's missing.
pertinax, Oct 19 2015

       Getting things incorrect is very valuable for the evolutionary process. If ever an intelligent alien species ever showed up on our doorstep, we would do well to avoid them, as they will likely have been the result of getting a lot of things incorrect over the millenia.
RayfordSteele, Oct 19 2015

       Are they free range?
not_morrison_rm, Oct 20 2015

       // they will likely have been the result of getting a lot of things incorrect over the millenia //   

       You're not making many friends here, [Rayford] ...
8th of 7, Oct 21 2015

       My great hope for the internet and mass mind hinges on this getting things incorrect. Because people make similar mistakes over and over, unaware that others have previously made the same mistake. Our ancestors devised stories to educate people on mistakes that could be made, and stories are more popular now than ever. But the internet vastly expands the amount of mistakes available for perusal and edification.   

       On embarking on an endeavor one can google the particulars and within a breathhold learn of terrifying and avoidable mistakes made by people who have previously attempted that endeavor.   

       If mistake makers are idiots, the vending of them or at least their mistakes will be of great benefit to the species.
bungston, Oct 21 2015


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