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 ... He-Man Wrestling Federation Horse Jumping Humans Vs Simians Intra Sport Competition Jet bird wings! Kite Swinging Laser Goal Miyagi Inner Game Object Wrestling ...

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# Jet bird wings!

Human just isn't built for flying.
 (+3, -8) [vote for, against]

Many have tryed to imitate bird wings before and the major problem since, has been swing power. Human just isn't built for flying.

But let's say we install tiny(as small as possible) jets in to the wings. Evenly distributed they would add power to a swing. When to swing? : The answer would perhaps be in a small computer chip which would activate the jets as soon as you'd try to move them up or down. It could also be upgraded to add more or less power to a swing depending on the swing-power we'd use.

In case of a malfunction wings would have a parasuit installed.

 — dr Theory, Sep 06 2006

Ornithopters http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ornithopter
[zen_tom, Sep 11 2006]

 "AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH"

"I take it you're on a cell phone, and you're calling to report a malfunction?"
 — normzone, Sep 06 2006

shouldn't that be a capital d?
 — po, Sep 06 2006

you're not one for capitalisation instruction [po].
 — methinksnot, Sep 06 2006

 — dr Theory, Sep 07 2006

 it just looks top heavy, snotty.

:P
 — po, Sep 07 2006

There are many very light materials out there.
 — dr Theory, Sep 07 2006

 OK, first issue, tiny jets. Nice idea, but exactly how tiny are we talking about here?

 Second issue. Newton's laws of motion. You're using an external force (i.e. downforce from your jets) to try to create an opposing external force (i.e. lift from your wing-flags)

It's just not going to happen because the two forces are going to equally and oppositely cancel one another out.
 — zen_tom, Sep 07 2006

 If you want an argument, I'm the very man for the job.

 Here's a start.

 You: Oh no it isn't.

 Me: Oh yes it is

 — Murdoch, Sep 07 2006

Jets take a while to spin up, they don't just stop and start. Solid fuel rockets start quickly, but unfortunately they don't stop. At all. Liquid fuel rockets are heavy and insanely dangerous. Peroxide rocket technology is probably the best thing for what you want to achieve.
 — wagster, Sep 07 2006

Oh, and while I'm at it - what's the "sport"?
 — Murdoch, Sep 07 2006

What [zen_tom] said. If the problem is not being able to flap hard enough, the jets described will do nothing to help.
 — Texticle, Sep 07 2006

//Very fast, vibrating, scalding hot, short lived, standing// - Now that you put it like that, I'm tempted to vote [+].
 — wagster, Sep 09 2006

 Now, that's what I like a nice old down-beat.

 Oh and I agree that jets wouldn't be the answer. It was just brainstorming without thinking.

Then mybe there is another way a, more mechanical way of adding power to flaping. With at least one egine of course...
 — dr Theory, Sep 11 2006

dr Theory, have you ever heard of an ornithopter? If we're not talking jets, and are moving over to an unspecified mechanical mode of flapperation, do we actually have anything new here?
 — zen_tom, Sep 11 2006

Well, I like this [+]. I feel there's room for two giant coke bottles and a couple hundred mentos.(you'd have to reconfigure for the best positioning of these bottles to obtain the ultimate thrust and soaking)Either way the visulisation of our mento jockey arse up and scuffed chinned seems comical.
 — skinflaps, Sep 11 2006

 Yes I,ve heard. But I'm thinking more like ornitman. those are flaping planes.

I know I'm beeing intrusive and tiresome but wouldn't it be great to wake up in the morning and go for a fly arround the block.
 — dr Theory, Sep 11 2006

May I sell you some mushrooms?
 — skinflaps, Sep 11 2006

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