Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Strap *this* to the back of your cat.

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London Underground Premium Access

Premium access to the underground
 
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Anybody who has ever travelled on London underground will have used the escalators. Many of you will have stared mindlessly at the legs of the person in front of you, or the adverts on the wall. You might even have risked catching the eye of somebody travelling in the opposite direction.

How many of you, however, have noticed that between most escalators there is usually a large metal panelled area? The area is usually quite wide, and has "Stand on the right" and "No smoking" signs along the length.

Canary wharf is perhaps the best example of this, as you descend into the main atrium area there are numerous escalators, and large expanses of panelling between each elevator.

My proposal is simple. Remove the metal signs, so a large, smooth, piece of metal is present. A new "premium" london underground ticket would be introduced. Holders of such tickets would be permitted to slide down, to be caught on a suitably soft mattress. Kind of like a water slide, just without the water (which would cause havoc with the tube system, but might be meritted on the higher lines such as the DLR?).

In a sense, this is a refinement of http://www.halfbakery.com/idea/ Alternative_20Tube_20access_20for _ 20dare_20devils#1015413113, however I'd suggest this is something that can be built cheaply, very easily, and very quickly, and result in significant funds for London Transport. And a happier travelling public.

For rock climbers, the challenge of climbing up the slide would be available, but only in off peak hours.

For those with peculiar tastes, the signs could be left for a 'rougher' ride for the more 'adventurous' londoner.

Buskers at the bottom of slides are best advised to avoid the area. Actually, best not tell them. They'll soon learn.

Once successfully implemented, this could possibly be licensed to other underground systems.

rleyton, Jul 17 2003

Earlier, more extensive proposal http://www.halfbake...for_20dare_20devils
Dedicated tunnels required. Regretfully no support for fetishists. [rleyton, Oct 04 2004]

helter skelter buses - some fool did it. http://www.halfbake...r_20skelter_20buses
[po, Oct 04 2004]

canary warf http://www.voidware.../gallery\cwarf4.jpg
many times, ive *very* nearly tried it! [barkinghugh, Oct 04 2004]

[link]






       I wonder whether, in fact, the little signs and nodules of metal sticking out every 50cm or so on the slope are designed specifically to stop people from decending at speed. If you've ever tried decending as they are now, you'll know it's not a comfortable (and certainly not a premium) service.
neilp, Jul 17 2003
  

       I'm sure they probably are. Hence the "embrace and extend" idea to do away with such deterents, and charge for the privilege.   

       Without such bumps, it would be fun. And if you can charge £20pp to go to a theme park, £1.50 or somesuch on your tube ticket each week is a small price to pay...
rleyton, Jul 17 2003
  

       I've always thought of this, or running down. Weird. You could drape a rope down it to hang on too.
git, Jul 17 2003
  

       you'd need to be quick getting off at the bottom, in case some fat guy with 3 laptops and a briefcase is right behind you. Course, if it were a pretty young thing, you might be tempted to dally..   

       Also you'd have to make sure people didn't slow themselves down with their feet since a multiple pile up would not be pretty. Especially for the person travelling headfirst.
mp83709, Jul 17 2003
  

       Perhaps a straw matt could be supplied, or, (as in my day as a wee nipper), half a canoe seems to get the best speeds up on a serious slope. Those orange safety ropes that you see on ski runs could guarantee riders safety. You know, like the one Milla Jovovich wore in Fifth element.
jh84169, Jul 17 2003
  

       [Rods] - Take out the stairs of the buses and replace with helter-skelter. This would exit directly on to the pavement.
Gordon Comstock, Jul 17 2003
  

       linky.
po, Jul 17 2003
  

       ha! ive been thinking of doing this for *years*. in fact the sticky-out metal bits look like they might hurt a lot. although ive spent a lot of time checking out stations with less deterrent. some have handrails with knobbles that ive been almost tempted to slide down. one thing tho' is that you get a really messy t-shirt or pants if you try this stuff. PS. ive added a link to a picture i took at the warf. enjoy.
barkinghugh, Jul 17 2003
  

       I've ridden many subways and the London Underground is pretty far from premium.   

       Once at Waterloo station, a gang of kids tried to mug me for my Sony Walkman, but they were so unprepared they didn't even bring a knife. Somehow they thought peer pressure would do the trick.
FloridaManatee, Jul 17 2003
  

       Re [barkinghugh]'s link. This is a Freestyle track, No?
Mmmmmmm.........Moguls! +
gnomethang, Jul 18 2003
  
      
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