Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Getting blown into traffic is never fun.

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Portable Zebra

Cross the road whenever, whereever
  (+19, -6)(+19, -6)
(+19, -6)
  [vote for,

<American voice-over fella>

"A rollout, linoleum zebra crossing is the perfect answer to problematic road crossing. Whenever you wanna cross, just rollout your own personal plastic zebra crossing and wait for the traffic to stop*. Cross and then rollup once again.

Portable Zebra. Cross the road whenever, wherever.

*Doesn't apply in France or Italy. If another zebra has been rolled out, ask to use before rolling out your own."

</American voice over fella>

jonthegeologist, Oct 28 2004

Chindogu's portable zebra crossing http://www.chindogu...hindogu/chin10.html
[spiritualized, Oct 28 2004]

(?) The Completely Useless Sally Gray FAQ http://www.xerez.de...co.uk/SGRAYFAQ.html
She's got a degree in molecular biology, and wasn't actually raised by wolves. She wasn't just a pretty face, y'know. [spiritualized, Oct 28 2004]

portable zebra http://www.iqtoys.a...page=item/item=1213
to distract traffic cops while you make a getaway [k_sra, Oct 28 2004]

coming soon - pocket size blow-up belisha beacon http://www.beepingb...s/magnus/beacon.jpg
[po, Oct 31 2004]


       A few of my friends have gotten tickets from cops for jay-walking. If only they had the portable zebra.
Machiavelli, Oct 28 2004

       Oooh! I like, I like. Of course pedestrians should have right of way.   

       Mind you, I'd probably hesitate to use it on motorways.
Taika, Oct 28 2004

       Perhaps your shoes could rubber stamp the zebra. So, walk every which way, it's still your right of way.
ldischler, Oct 28 2004

       My mum tells the tale of when she was a student at Aberdeen and the students got fed up with the level of traffic on the road outside the students union, so one night they painted their own zebra crossing....
prufrax, Oct 28 2004

       Sadly, baked by those whacky geniuses at Chindogu.   

       I came up with this idea quite some time ago, and had a post ready to put on here, until I found the website that I've linked.   

       A portable zebra... now there's a different line of enquiry all together.
spiritualized, Oct 28 2004

       Yeah, I saw this on "It'll never work" when I was a kid. Non-UK residents or those who missed the programme - it was basically this site in televisual form but for kids. I thought it was the "Shindogu" society?
harderthanjesus, Oct 28 2004

       "It'll Never Work", presented by Sally Gray, what a great show that was. They held a competition that rewarded those who sent in daft ideas, like inflatable dartboards and solar powered torches. It was almost like Halfbakery TV.   

       They would always have a 30 second skit dedicated to some whacky invention that Chindogu, pronounced Shindogu, had come up with.   

       Sally Gray went on to present 50-50, also on CBBC, a big drop in quality from Sally's It'll Never Work days. I don't know what she's doing now.
spiritualized, Oct 28 2004

       ha ha ha ha... I thought this was about unrolling a plastic (animal kind of) zebra! This silly mexican perspective of mine... [+]
Pericles, Oct 28 2004

       Sorry I'm thinking another zebra maybe. [link]
k_sra, Oct 28 2004

       [k_sra], that's exactly what came up in my mind when I read the idea's title.
Pericles, Oct 28 2004

       Ha! I like the "realistic-looking" part in the description for the inflatable zebra.   

       Does the guy that rolls out the crosswalk come with the product (see roller-out guy in Chindogu link)? That would be cool because then I wouldn't have to get my hands dirty.
Machiavelli, Oct 28 2004

       <Unrequested insight into the mindset and homelife of jonthegeologist> The title was completely deliberate. Frankly, I find the idea of a genuine portable zebra perversly funny. Ridiculous.   

       It is for the same reason that I own a 6foot inflatable giraffe called Mr Larry. </uiitmahoj>
jonthegeologist, Oct 28 2004

       If there is enough time for a roll of carpet to reach the otherside of the road without having a car run over the bulk of the carpet, then is there any point for there to be a zebra crossing there in the first place? I say yes, but rolling the zebra crossing carpet roll across a busy street would take technique and timing.   

       To roll a length of carpet across a road, you would first need to put the roll down on the pavement, with the bulk of the roll facing the street, and the exposed end of the carpet beneath your feet. It is then a test of your strength and skill – can you roll the carpet all the way across the road without interference? Or would the wheels of a passing car pull the carpet from under your feet, possibly leaving you unconscious on the side of the road?
spiritualized, Oct 28 2004

       I believe the technique required to unroll your zebra is roughly the same as to deploy a police stinger (one of those devices to puncture car tyres and disable a car).   

       "...Unroll your zebra .... " - bet I'll never have cause to use that sentence again. I should take a moment to enjoy it.
jonthegeologist, Oct 28 2004

       [spiritualized], your point is exactly the reason why you should have someone else roll it out for you. No, I'm not volunteering. ;)
Machiavelli, Oct 29 2004

       Well here I was thinking the Zebra stripes confused cops the same way they confuse various carnivores in Africa. Hmm... dressing up as striped dohnuts?
MrDaliLlama, Oct 29 2004

       i like this idea, but fishbone for use the american voice over fella - i hear him too often.
benfrost, Oct 29 2004

       *Vanessa Paradis French voice-over also available.
jonthegeologist, Oct 29 2004

       cudos to the Americans for marketting such a clever item. (sarcasm)
dentworth, Oct 29 2004

       [dentworth] not an American idea ... no no. Very British indeed, but big american voice-overs seem to be de rigeur even here...
jonthegeologist, Oct 29 2004

       // It is for the same reason that I own a 6foot inflatable giraffe called Mr Larry. </uiitmahoj> //   

       Well if you will just happen to mention the week before your birthday how funny 6 foot inflatable giraffes are then you've got to accept what happens to you!
hazel, Oct 29 2004

       I am totally amazed, (not sarcasm) because here, the Austrailian voice-over is chic, and for snooty Jaguar and Infiniti commercials, *educated* brit accents seem unavoidable.
dentworth, Oct 29 2004

       strange how these things are [dentworth]
jonthegeologist, Oct 29 2004

       Oh, and here in the US, enough drivers seem perfectly OK with turning a blind-eye to crosswalks, that this idea would be laughable.   

       We don't seem to have any "people" here, just "Drivers", "pedestrians", "bicyclists", etc... all with different levels of rights to survive.   

       Oh, and the links added seem to indicate not that the idea is already "baked", but simply already "half-baked"... is that in the FAQ?
sophocles, Oct 29 2004

       The idea has been physically realised, as can be seen in the pictures that I have linked, so I believe that it's baked.
spiritualized, Oct 30 2004

       Chindogu in Japanese is pronounced Chindogu, not Shindogu. That's how Japanese works.
harderthanjesus, Oct 30 2004

       Didn't they pronounce it "Shindogu" on the show? Was it just my hearing? Am I just very confused?
spiritualized, Oct 30 2004

       I thought they did.
harderthanjesus, Oct 31 2004

       love that link [po]!
jonthegeologist, Oct 31 2004

       //That's how Japanese works. harderthanjesus//   

       I didn't know they worked that hard!   

       [JonGeo], you can unroll my zebra anytime. *winkwink* hehehe. But I worry that a zebra crossing mat will, in time, become quit soiled and no longer fit for cuddling against your work clothes as you walk (as in [spirit]'s link). How can this be counteracted?
k_sra, Nov 01 2004

       [k_sra] I had originally envisioned that the Portable Zebra would be made of a wipe clean linoleum, but lately, I've been rather taken with the idea of a luxurious carpet finish.   

       Either way, to counter the soiling, I recommend that zebra-buyers opt for the teflon (lino) or ScotchGuard (carpet) surfaces.
jonthegeologist, Nov 02 2004


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