Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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On the one hand, true. On the other hand, bollocks.

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Rude Abbreviator

Cram text into smaller space by insulting the reader
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There are many places on computers where text is manipulated to better fit into a confined space. For instance, the tabs on a web browser typically show an icon with the first N letters of the page title. This is a rather simple and boring example and we can do better.

The idea is an algorithm that abbreviates with the intent to be rude or insult.

Without this algorithm, while perusing the website of the Young Republicans Association, your browser tab may read something like "Young Republ..." Boring!

With this algorithm, the title would be automatically abbreviated to "You..R...Ass..." Better!

This would also work for any old text box on the web. Instead of dynamically shrinking the text or sizing other things to fit, the algorithm would just abbreviate certain words to mete out juvenile insults or rude suggestions.

V2 of the algorithm would generate insulting or lewd initialisms. So, if you are tempted to comment on this idea with something like "You should perhaps envision not insulting someone," be very careful friend! Your helpful comment could actually be rendered as "You should perhaps envision not insulting someone (PENIS)."

the porpoise, Oct 21 2019

[link]






       This algorithm is already in use, and is employed in on- screen channel guides for TV. Depending on the length of the programme (or the amount of time left, if it is already running), the name is truncated in various ways.   

       At the moment, I can see "Homes Under the Ham" on Home, "Great Value Jew" on GemsTV (followed later by a short programme called "Huge Jew"), "Silent Wit" on Drama (evidently a programme about mimes) and "The Big Ban" on E4. There's also the intriguing "Anger Man" on 4Music and "Mystery Din" on Food Network.
MaxwellBuchanan, Oct 21 2019
  

       //Mystery Din//...isn’t that the title if [IT]’s next album?
Frankx, Oct 22 2019
  
      
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