h a l f b a k e r y
Naturally, seismology provides the answer.
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Seagulls (and pigeons) are famous for dropping their shit
on everything below them.
Global warming is a major concern to all but the most
wilfully ignorant among us.
UBCo Labs is on the verge of releasing a selectively bred
population of seagulls that are trained and programmed
(hatching?) to eat foods likely to result in
massive quantities of stark white seagull shit being
produced throughout the birds' life (30 to 40 years).
This will result in a higher albedo than usual in those
land areas where seagulls are normally found, resulting
in greater reflection of sunlight back into space, and a
slight cooling of Earth.
Coming soon after seagulls... pigeons, crows and emus.
||Mike Score and his brother Ali would approve of this.
||Weren't we bitching about skyrats' lack of defecatory
discretion just a couple of days ago? Now you want to go
and make _more_ fleigerscheisse?
||Well, it's unlikely they'll stop, so I thought I'd put
them to good use.