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Vuvuzela Section

In keeping with the recent trend.
  (+1, -3)
(+1, -3)
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For all the talk of banning the extremely annoying vuvuzela, nothing has been done—the vuvuzela is a "South African tradition", and there would be a public outcry. Rather than ban the plastic horns completely, I suggest that the tournament organizers relegate vuvuzela-blowing spectators to a specially designated section, far up in the stands. Being relegated to the "nosebleed" section would not only keep vuvuzelas far away from television camera microphones, but would also discourage the usage of the horns overall.
DrWorm, Jun 15 2010

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       Don't know about you but I seem to hear mosquitos whether they are an inch from my face or several meters away. It is not so much the "loudness" of the beast but more the frequency. 233 hz in this case, as well as the simple harmonics. My suggestion (without an outright ban) is to have them all in a section that accelerates away from the 1) stadium 2) audio mics, ata rate that would reduce them both in volume and pitch.
4whom, Jun 15 2010

       Did you mean "sectioned"?
wagster, Jun 15 2010

       //233 Mhz in this case, as well as the simple harmonics//
You can hear RF?
AbsintheWithoutLeave, Jun 15 2010

4whom, Jun 15 2010

       I thought this would be an additional group of musicians for an orchestra.
Aristotle, Jun 16 2010

       I was expecting this to be application of Apollonius of Perga's work in slicing Vuvuzelae along various planes, perhaps to alter their accoustic properties.
zen_tom, Jun 16 2010

       this is exactly why I like confetti ideas...
xandram, Jun 16 2010

       I seems the way to stop them was give the SA goalie a red card, and put three in the back of the net. Whoever said the Swiss were disinterested and impervious to reason...?
4whom, Jun 17 2010

       //Swiss// sp. Uruguayans.
shudderprose, Jun 17 2010

       //application of Apollonius of Perga's work in slicing Vuvuzelae along various planes, perhaps to alter their accoustic properties.//   

       Sp.: Vuvuzelists
MaxwellBuchanan, Jun 17 2010

       Or possibly "vuvuzealots"
MaxwellBuchanan, Jun 17 2010

       psssst [shudder...] the match officials were Swiss...
4whom, Jun 17 2010

       Appolonius...slicing...what do I look like? A slot machine?
4whom, Jun 17 2010

       Whatever happened to the VuVu Front, Reg?
He's over there.
4whom, Jun 17 2010

       I was on an old-school chat-site the other day when somebody acccidentally called them "Zuluvulvas"
paragluteus, Jun 19 2010

       As a former Brass player, I just want to know why no one's figured out how to get another few notes out of them. Not real high in tone quality, but it should be possible to get the same range of pitch you do out of a bugle.
MechE, Jun 20 2010

       [MechE] I'm not so sure. The high notes on a bugle are harmonics of your lips' frequency, aren't they? Seems like the vuvuzela is more like buzzing on a mouthpiece.
mouseposture, Jun 20 2010

       Disappointed. I was rather hoping that this would be like a Caesarian Section but applied to people with annoying musical instruments.

Personally, my preferred solution to the vuvuzela menace is to combine it with the twin evil of the Mexican Wave to produce the Vuvuzela Wave. A sweeping cacophony of sound that sweeps round the stadium like a seismic shockwave, disorienting players, officials, TV microphones, commentators and, ultimately, toppling the stadium from it's foundations due to harmonic reasonance. It's what did for Jericho you know.
DrBob, Jun 23 2010

       *hurls croissant bobwards*
calum, Jun 23 2010


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