Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Replace "light" with "sausages" and this may work...

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abuse bumpersticker

How's My Driving?
  (+9, -5)
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Sell a bumper sticker that says "How's My Driving? Call (800) 123-4567.

A taped message hurls abuse at the caller.

Pretty sweet.

anm2254, Dec 01 2000

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       I love it.   

       You'd really only get callers when you had done something to piss them off (intentionally of course), so abuse is always appropriate.   

       If you did get a call saying how well you drive, the loser who called would deserve abuse anyway.
Phurge, Dec 02 2000
  

       You could set it up like this: "press 1 to praise my driving, press 2 to criticze my driving, press 3 to ask me out on a date." Even if you think somone calling to praise or ask you out on a date is worthy of abuse, you can tailor the resulting abuse to the situation,
arghblah, Jun 10 2001
  

       In the UK (and elswhere I presume) there are 'Abuse Lines' which you can phone up and get an ear-full. Quite what purpose this serves is beyond me. However, I think that anyone who didnt recognize the premium rate 0898 code deserves everyhing they get.   

       Also, you could abuse your victim for using a phone whilst driving.   

       Incidently 'Max Power' magazine once published a free cover sticker which read "How's my driving? - Call 999 you flippin road captin!"
nick3, Aug 28 2001
  

       One dubious sticker from a few years ago was absolutely guaranteed to piss off somebody -- in fact, anybody who read it: "Don't like my driving? Call 1-800-EAT-SHIT." (As if the I'm-just-following-my-hood-ornament driving of their owners weren't enough of an insult.) I only saw this brilliant riposte on vehicles that wouldn't look much different if you took a 9-pound sledge hammer to them; maybe someone did. I sure wanted to. Never let it be said that you can't get attention or make money by stirring up lousy karma.
whatsbruin, Sep 04 2001
  

       Actually, you can have a lot of fun calling one of these 'How's My Driving Lines'. Just tell them that you've seen the driver do 31 MPH in a 30 zone, or that he's parked near a school and must be a paedophile, or you didn't like the way he looked at you as you overtook him, or he needs a shave etc. The list goes on and on.
PT, Jun 06 2002
  
      
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