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confuse and bewilder people

catch people off guard with unusual statements
  [vote for,

sometimes i enjoyjust saying things to complete strangers with the intent of confusing them. First there are several conditions necessary to achieve the best result.

1. you must have never seen this individual before

2. this idividual must have never seen you before

3. the subject must be totally unprepared

then after choosing youre subject, greet them in a familiar manner and make a completely bizzarre statement, an

example: "Hello Harry, hows you're Gonnohrea"

"So, do I look any better to you now"

keep doing this to random individuals and eventually you will be able to bewilder anyone.

demo_nova, Dec 19 2002

(?) Secret Comedy Suffix Club http://www.halfbake...edy_20Suffix_20Club
Another fun game to play with people's heads [krelnik, Oct 04 2004]

(?) Use Bizarre Metaphors http://www.halfbake...Bizarre_20Metaphors
...and another. [krelnik, Oct 04 2004]


       I say this at least once a month:
See that guy over there? He said he was gonna kick your ass.
thumbwax, Dec 20 2002

       I think this is a fun idea, very much in the same vein as "Secret Comedy Suffix Club" or "Use Bizarre Metaphors." Maybe not for everyone, sure. But why the negative voting?
krelnik, Dec 20 2002

       You mean like [screwdriverqueen]'s treatment, [krelnik]?
bristolz, Dec 20 2002

       I've had people attempt to do this to me. My reaction was "go away", not "I'm so confused and bewildered". If I chose to vote on this, I'd vote "fishbone" because I don't think the idea is particularly effective.   

       I was never treated poorly as a newbie on this site.   

       I guess I will vote, since I'm in the neighborhood.
half, Dec 20 2002

       it may have something to do with the heavy use of the word victim. these things are subliminal in a subtle way.
po, Dec 20 2002

       I,m all confused and bewildered as to why I keep coming here to find out what you lot are blithering on about. I don't think anyone needs to come up with a specific idea to confuse and bewilder. It seems to come fairly naturally to most half bakers. dogfanbeltyoghurt, I say....
briandamage, Dec 20 2002

       [Rods Tiger]'s annotation shows how an idea like this can be turned from something lacking invention, because of its diffuse, generalized nature, into a formula for something that is inventive.
bristolz, Dec 20 2002

       Half has actually been around longer than his account page indicates, under a different name, just fyi.
RayfordSteele, Dec 20 2002

       In the interest of full disclosure, [Ray] is correct. My first posting of any sort was on Apr 13 2002. However, all of my ideas and annotations are connected with my current account name. So, I'm a few weeks older than I look.   

       The extent of my poor treatment as a newbie was that other 'bakers convinced me of the need to change my user name. One of said other 'bakers also later cajoled me in to rejoining the ranks of the active 'bakers after I dropped out for a short time. (Some day I'll get even with that one! <g>)
half, Dec 20 2002

       April, heck, I thought you were one of the ancients. I rather enjoyed your original username... just wish I could remember what it was.
RayfordSteele, Dec 20 2002

       makes a circular gesture with an index finger around the temple area as a clue.
po, Dec 20 2002

       [krelnek] do you care to substantiate that if you can which I doubt.
po, Dec 20 2002

       po, I know it's something like that but can't put my finger on it, and it's been bugging on and off for weeks. Would that mean that I am 'whatever it is?'   

       half-empty? half-wit? half-brain, half-life, half-loopy, half-genius? half-senior moment? None of 'em sound right. Arrgh!   

       wait, half-crazy! Is that it?
RayfordSteele, Dec 20 2002

       I just wish he'd write to someone else apart from his imaginary friend he keeps going on about. you know the one who *made* him come back to us :)
po, Dec 20 2002

       All of my friends are imaginary.
Most of [RS]'s guesses would be appropriate adjectives to use when describing me.
half, Dec 20 2002

       Seems to me this got voted down 'cause it's just kinda immature and dumb. I'm not saying it's not a good idea to creatively f*ck with people's heads, just that inflicting irritating psychodrama on strangers is kinda teenage...
snarfyguy, Dec 20 2002

       exactly what snarfy says....this is subjecting random strangers to a juvenile drama....whereas the suffix club is used amongst a group and the bizarre metaphors was proposed as an "exercise" to put a spin on those boring, business meetings.....so, um do you like my new fishbone? I was thinking of you when I bought it......
Marassa, Dec 20 2002

       Surely you mean "inciteful?" ;-)
bristolz, Dec 20 2002

       If you really want to confuse and bewilder people go to a public place like a mall or just do it on a footpath in the street, take some chalk and draw a circle on the ground, stand in the circle, if sombody steps inside the circle hiss and lash out at them, try to scratch them if you can, after a few days of this people will certainly be confused and bewildered at your behavior. This time of year seems to be best for this game as the streets are uasually more crowded due to christmas but at other times of the year you may be waiting for days before sombody steps in your circle, at these times of year a more appropriate place might be an elevator or a narrow alleyway.
Gulherme, Dec 20 2002

       Or you could try to draw a penis on their clothes with chalk <winks at Gulherme>
madradish, Dec 21 2002

       I knew someone who, as a student, had a technique to confuse and bewilder other students during Freshers' Week. Teamed up with a friend and a walkie-talkie, he would introduce himself to a passer-by and find out their name and a few details about them. Once the person had gone on their way again he would radio a description of the person, their name and the details to his friend. The friend would go up to the person and pretend that he knew him/her (by using his/her name and asking topical questions using the the details). The person would be left wondering where they had met.   

       I would like to say though that I don't think that confusing and bewildering people is a very worthy goal and is unlikely to lead to becoming 'a light of enlightenment shining for yourself and others' as the Buddists would say. (I'm sure I'm preaching to the converted here but thought I'd state the obvious anyway).
Dinney_Squinney, Dec 21 2002

       I am reminded of a George Carlin routine about "keeping people alert." Some of his suggestions were:   

       o Go into a quiet little shop thats open on a Sunday morning and scream at the top of your lungs, "ARE YOU OPEN ON THURSDAY?" They'll say, "Yes" and you run out.   

       o When you get up to the window at a roadway tollbooth, _bargain_ with the guy. Tell him you heard it was "free Chevrolet day."   

       o Stand in line at the bank on a payday when there is a huge, long line. When you finally get to the teller, just ask for change of a nickel.
krelnik, Dec 21 2002

       at McDonald's ask for a whopper
demo_nova, Dec 22 2002

       My sister used to work the drive through at a Burger King, and we would drive up and order non-menu items like spaghetti.
krelnik, Dec 22 2002

       //at McDonald's ask for a whopper//. Years ago I worked in fast food. I can tell you from experience that when you order a "Big Mac" at Wendy's, you are the one that appears confused and bewildered. The person behind the counter/drive-thru speaker hears it frequently. It wasn't funny the first time or the 1000th time.
half, Dec 22 2002

       bet they didn't ask for a depp fried Mars bar, large chips and a pickled egg though. (yeah, I know the typo - but I like it so it stays :) )
po, Dec 22 2002

       Here's something I've been meaning to try for a while...   

       In a busy town centre, assemble a group of people that can be described as "a small crowd", and stand and point excitedly to the top of a tall building, as if there is something of interest up there, or something has happened. Hopefully, other members of public will be intrigued by this, and stop to ask what all the commotion is about, to which any member of the crowd will reply with something like "I'm not sure... I think.. umm... there was a crowd of people here looking at something, so....". As the passers-by gather, members of the original group subtly walk off, one by one. If all goes well, you will be left with a completely new crowd of people, not exactly sure what they're looking up at, attracting even more passers-by. The perpetrators of the prank sitting nearby, laughing themselves silly.   

       This was not my idea, but I can't remember where I got it from. No doubt there will be a flood of links to somewhere else where this idea was published.
DRstrathmore, Dec 22 2002

       Beats me, but I know a guy who actually does that. He's beside himself with the hilarity of it as well, making it doubly incomprehensible to me.
snarfyguy, Dec 22 2002

       I once dressed as chewbacca and went into maccas with a group of my friends with a boom box and started break dancing, go to the drive in order a cone and throw it straight back through the window at the person inside, throw drinks across the counter at the workers, throw pickles on the windows, play fry basketball with the light fittings, pretend to fall over and throw your meal everywhere just so you can go and get another one for free, run through the store naked and film it, order a large drink and a softserve cone open the drink on the counter scoop off the top of the cone with your hand and put it in the drink put the lid on and put a straw in it and watch the fountain of drink that shoots all over the counter. I love maccas.
Gulherme, Dec 22 2002


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