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If you scour the landscape you will find thousands of feral cats. These cats can be harvested and sent to Alaska for a sled race that may very well challenge the Iditarod in popularity. The sleds would be similar to those used in the more familiar race. After hitching up 40 or 50 cats to a sled, you
get them to go where you want by shining a laser pointer just ahead of them. (ATTENTION, SPONSOR OPPORTUNITY: an adhesive bandage company may be a good bet, focusing on the poor schmucks tasked with hitching the cats to the sled.) Once the cats have served their tour of duty, you can thank them for a job well done and turn them loose on the polar ice cap to commune with nature and cavort with the polar bears. Win-win for everyone. (The once dwindling population of polar bears may see a dramatic rise in the years that follow, giving Arctic scientists something to puzzle over.)
||On first read, my brain skipped the word "bandage". Still bun-worthy, though.
||I wonder if horses are the only creatures that
can be made into a decent glue...