Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
h a l f b a k e r y
Yeah, I wish it made more sense too.

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real coffee table

particle board made from coffee grounds
  (+10, -3)
(+10, -3)
  [vote for,

I tried using regular wood glue, didn't stick together, seems there's too much oil left in the grinds . But there must be a chemically suited glue, to mix, then press into whatever form, maybe even add some unseen reinforcing wire. The grinds have a very rich deep color, maybe the dried board could be polished. Might smell nice.
M Carter, Jan 25 2008

Coffee Ground Logs http://www.metaeffi...coffee-grounds.html
These are meant for burning, but perhaps you could repurpose them...? (They use wax to hold the grinds together, presumably because that's pretty flammable too.) [DrCurry, Jan 25 2008]

Two cups of coffee Two_20Cups_20Of_20Coffee
For the coffee ground table to hold. Or do we now need 2 coffee-coffee tables? [blissmiss, Jan 26 2008]


       I think you should rework this from the grounds up. Feel free to espresso your own opinion.
phoenix, Jan 25 2008

       You wouldn't want to spill anything on it.
skinflaps, Jan 25 2008

       That would surely put the mochas on it.
hippo, Jan 25 2008

       Banter aside, I rather like this. I imagine that polyester resin would work.
angel, Jan 25 2008

       Most things mixed with resin will be strong/stable enough to make furniture. Try that. If the oil is still a problem, wash it off with solvent. And maybe incorporate this croissant.
DrCurry, Jan 25 2008

       How long has this idea been percolating?
shapu, Jan 25 2008

       Probably been simmering for a while. It does have some pot-ential, probably a good idea to buy in now before it's too latte.
8th of 7, Jan 25 2008

       Wait til Le Monde gets wind of this.
jutta, Jan 25 2008

       [rcarty] In view of the fact that this idea largely duplicates that of {what to do with all those coffee grinds}, and in view of the fact that the latter idea contains no capital letters whatsoever, I say keep this one and make the other one retrospectively redundant.   

       Incidentally, shouldn't it be "coffee grounds"?
MaxwellBuchanan, Jan 25 2008

       If it doesn't stand on its own, it'll make a lousy coffee table!   

       (No, we're not deleting old ideas in favor of repeats with better spelling. As for a coffee table being redundant with the "furnature" [sic, sigh] of the earlier one, I'll leave that to the author here; and agree with rcarty that the coffee/coffee joke may make it worth keeping.)
jutta, Jan 25 2008

       // retrospectively redundant //   

       Errr, can an idea be "prospectively redundant" ?
8th of 7, Jan 25 2008

       Mis-heard headline amongst banter: "President Tables Redundant Coffee Retrospective, Grounds Hijacker".
Canuck, Jan 25 2008

       There are ways of removing oils. May i suggest using wax from some candles you probably have laying around. The only issue i can see is grinding up the candles into a fine enough mix. What is the setup you are using to compress the coffee grinds. Chances are you are not using enough force. Chances are you could not possibly even generate that force in your house.
Antegrity, Jan 26 2008

       Could somebody pleas hijack my ideas and rewrite them better? Thank you. Feel free to do my annotations to.
zeno, Jan 26 2008

       Why I like this site, an idea is tossed up and honed by billions of surfers (mostly silent, until they have something really good to say.)   

       Chapeau to -half- and -Max.- didn't think to check; glad to revive -masher's- idea, innocently 'rebranded.'   

       Thanks -xclmap- the NASA article was great. Interlocking grounds are unexpected plus.   

       So the grounds might make extra strong board, likely much harder than average press board or plywood. Using plastic resin is a last resort, there must be a chemical glue that reacts best with coffee oil, so it wouldn't even be necessary to pre-wash them in some powerful solvent, another last resort. Resin would cut any hope of a scent.   

       Thanks for your proposals _Antegrity. Wouldn't I then have to remove the wax? We're looking for a very strong bond, wax is weak.   

       Wonder what the hardness is compared to oak or crushed nut shells. It would probably make excellent stock to mill and form.   

       I've used a fine-grained, green tinted, anti-humidity, sub-floor, particle board for furniture. When varnished with authentic marine boat varnish it turns deep, rich green; and instead of the cheap feeling you get from too much gloss varnished pine furniture (sorry if I stepped on some toes,) here the gloss makes it look like some fine grain granite as the eye is drawn into the infinite particles. If you're house is filled with varnished yellow pine, you might want to add some of this deep green board.   

       Surprisingly attractive considering it's the cheapest board out there. Actually, just a half euro more than the large chips press board which is so ugly, or the medium chipped, as ugly. The edges can even be rounded without the need for edging, so panels can have easily and cheaply curved shapes and rounded edges. Might add some translucent tint to closely match surface and edge color.   

       A box with the 90°corners made from 45°cut edges, then sanded to a 1/4" radius gives the look of fine marble.Two or three polished coats and you have easy to work, lightweight 'granite.' Which happens to compliment strongly with varnished yellow pine moulding.   

       Easy to inlay with router. Laquer likely better, maybe for coffee grounds too.
M Carter, Jan 26 2008

       But wait, will it hold "two cups of coffee"? (Halfbaked coffee that is.)   

       I fear I might find friends of mine dwelling about under the table, since they love the scent of coffee. But then they would probably be under there anyway.
blissmiss, Jan 26 2008

       I think she's talking to the cockroaches again.
DrCurry, Jan 27 2008

       No..... the spiders, the spiders..... great big black hairy spiders with huge long hairy legs and great big bitey fangs, driping venom, coming to maim, rip, tear, poison, and finaly inject with digestive juices..........
8th of 7, Jan 27 2008

       damn... I *really* want a coffee table that makes the room smell like coffee
FlyingToaster, Jan 27 2008

       Well shit, I'd really like a "flying toaster", so there!
blissmiss, Jan 29 2008

       A quick search finds 101 ideas with the word "trebuchet" in them...   

       Or do you want it to be a more controlled flight?
shapu, Jan 29 2008

       well, the study/library should smell of cigar smoke and leather; the bathroom of some unidentifiable floral thingy; the garage is "eau d'diesel", so I want a conference area that smells of coffee.
FlyingToaster, Jan 30 2008

       depending on the meeting, it's gonna smell like that anyways.
FlyingToaster, Jan 30 2008


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