Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
h a l f b a k e r y
Replace "light" with "sausages" and this may work...

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Geek Dildo

dildo with custom mod's and/or overclocking
  (+12, -7)
(+12, -7)
  [vote for,

This would be the ultimate geeky sex toy. A sleek, shiny vibe with a window cut in the side, a sound responsive cold cathode light & wireless/bluetooth capable for uploading your favourite sexy mp3's into the didlo for some rythmic light displays. Hell let's treat the ladies, let's make this thing pulse in time with the music too. Of course, the wireless capabilities could also incorporate all the current meta-shagging technology that's circulating (online remote control sex toys, etc).

Maybe mount an exhaust fan at the base and hopefully draw away excess heat from the motor, ramp up the voltage a bit and overclock this geek-dong like it was a thoroughbred pentium chip :D

Salmon Of Doubt, Oct 31 2005

http://www.slashdong.org/ See logo, and some of the articles. [jutta, Nov 01 2005]

Disco Vibro Disco_20Vibro
Micky Dread [skinflaps, Nov 01 2005]

Greek dildo http://www.google.c...itesearch=&safe=off
...sorry, [zen_tom] [normzone, Nov 02 2005]


       This is genius.
sninctown, Oct 31 2005

       Why thank you [sninctown], they say that the line between genius and madness is a very thin one... Perhaps it's also hard to distinguish it from the outside?   

       I feel I've got to give credit where it's due for the inspiration for this as it might clear up any confusion before it starts (confused yet? I am!)   

       A user on my home forum suggested promoting the forum by offering free pr0n. I had difficulty in seeing the connection between pron and overclocking pc's (The main focus of the forum). Then the idea struck me like a man at the top of a waterfall with a crash helmet on... <%><
Salmon Of Doubt, Oct 31 2005

       What's pr0n, large shrimp?
bristolz, Nov 01 2005

contracts, Nov 01 2005

       I haven't Retsina that before.
normzone, Nov 01 2005

       //Triple DDD large prAwn/yaAwn?//
Do I dare mention Feta cheese?
blissmiss, Nov 01 2005

       I'm calling the acroPolis, there are some terrible puns around here today.
jonthegeologist, Nov 01 2005

       Don't all pile over at once.
egbert, Nov 01 2005

       (music in background)   

       "Did I ever tell you you're my gyro..."
normzone, Nov 01 2005

       Anyway, do female geeks exist? I've always thought women had too much inherent sense to develop the introspectively obsessive behaviour patterns necessary to become a geek.
egbert, Nov 01 2005

       I keep reading this as "Greek Dildo" and getting all confused.   

       What do the ancient greeks have to do with USB? Surely a big doric column would suffice?   

       btw - Welcome to the Bakery [Salmon] - I like your name, it reminds me that I still want to know what happens to that poor confused rhinoceros.
zen_tom, Nov 01 2005

       [UB] you need to speak up a bit. It seems no-one can hear you today.
egbert, Nov 01 2005

       Ooops, right you are [egbert] Sorry [UB]!   

       [edit] and [egbert], [normzone], [blissmiss] and [jonthegeologist]   

       That'll teach me to annotate from the hip.
zen_tom, Nov 01 2005

       "Anyway, do female geeks exist?"   

       Every once in a while, someone says something so mindblowingly stupid that I have to wonder how that person can manage to dress and wash themselves, let alone use the often difficult hard- and software devices that, ironically, end up bringing them to my attention.
jutta, Nov 01 2005

bristolz, Nov 01 2005

       From dictionary.com:
A person who is single-minded or accomplished in scientific or technical pursuits but is felt to be socially inept.

       Stupid? Maybe, but I haven't gotten personal. Thanks for clearing up the point, anyway.
egbert, Nov 01 2005

       When I read the title I also though this was some kind of a new fetish that I haven't heard about. Shrink a geek to a miniature size ... insert ...
obviously not.
ixnaum, Nov 02 2005

       Bubs, you say "fettaish", I say "feta". Your pun went past me at at 3am. (And I think being unkind to Egbert is unkind, and that sometimes people just say something off the cuff. I believe we have all done it in the past).
blissmiss, Nov 02 2005

       Do they make X-box "joy-sticks?"
RayfordSteele, Nov 02 2005

       //e-mail your latest orgasm to . . . co-workers// Unfortunately, most of them heard it.
baconbrain, Nov 02 2005

       Good point UB.   

       Some of you may know that I've recently begun a two year stint in the US. I've been surprised at how different things are from what I'm used to, given how visually familiar the US culture is to us Brits, but everything from ordering capital equipment to posting a letter has been a learning experience. I'm always open to trying things, though, so with this in mind I decided to heed [jutta's] advice this morning.   

       Well, I may not have got it quite right, but it's hard to see the merit in dressing first and then washing. I'm sitting here in damp collar and cuffs, the air conditioning above my desk is starting to make my sleeves crackle, and I'm shivering fit to bust. I can hardly operate this keyboard device thingy.   

       I know I'm not really clever, single minded, or socially inept, but right now, I do feel like a right dildo!
egbert, Nov 02 2005

       You'll survive, I just know it.
bristolz, Nov 02 2005

       //right dildo//   

       I always thought those things were ambidextrous...
zen_tom, Nov 02 2005

       Thanks, Bris. I just need to find some friends who understand my sense of humour...
egbert, Nov 02 2005

       If yo really want to rn with Americans, Yor first step shold be forgetting that the letter "" exists.
shapu, Nov 02 2005

       Thanks for the cle, [shap].   

       Wold that be the Nited States of America, then?
egbert, Nov 02 2005

       Of corse.   

       EDIT: Just read the annos more carefully. Euripides puns off fairly quickly around here.
shapu, Nov 02 2005

       Of course female greeks exist. The country wouldn't have been populated for as long without them.
Worldgineer, Nov 02 2005

       // I'd have thought that it was introspectively obsessive behaviuor patterns that set them apart from most men, [egbert]. All that cleaning and sewing and cooking and gossiping and dieting and stuff is just another channel for geekdom that would otherwise result in Bluetooth monitoring for personal sex aids and such.   

       Then you find a female geek, magnificent, nay, resplendent in her glory as a technogeek. They are often brilliant beyond measure, doing incredibly relevant and important humanitarian things like setting up oddball inventors' websites, to the delight of everyone involved. // god, I hope this is sarcasm or something...   

       I am in dire need of a bucket!
po, Nov 02 2005

       Nice Day Merca!
daaisy, Nov 02 2005

       A geeky thought--is it possible to make an electric dildo that moves back and forth by itself? It would just be a vibrator optimized for movement on the long axis, probably using the batteries as the counterweight. I can visualize it making a stroke of a couple of inches, depending on friction.   

       I can't Google for anything like it right now, as I am in a church-group's office. Shh!
baconbrain, Nov 03 2005

       Seems like the best possible time, to me.
shapu, Jan 05 2006

       [baconbrain], there is a great deal of electro-mechanical technology such as you're wondering about on the marketplace at this time, but I'm not going to link to it. Just not going to, that's all.
normzone, Jan 05 2006

       //is it possible to make an electric dildo that moves back and forth by itself? It would just be a vibrator optimized for movement on the long axis, probably using the batteries as the counterweight. I can visualize it making a stroke of a couple of inches, depending on friction. //   

       surely it is possible... but I think there's a reason why it hasn't been done. Something to do with why women on top always seem to rock back and forth rather than bouncing up and down like I want them to...
ye_river_xiv, Aug 18 2006

       It's that damned clitoris.
shapu, Aug 18 2006

       What? oh, yeah, that thing... Whatever it is. Sorry it took me so long to find this thread again...
ye_river_xiv, Mar 12 2008


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