Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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A Storied Blend

curl up with a good tea
  [vote for,

(formerly Tea Bag Novels, cf. novelTeabags)

This would be a big box filled with different teas. Each bag would be a different tea, and on each tag would be a different sentence, all from the same novel. The bags would be in the proper order so that each sentence follows the next correctly. The flavor could perhaps offer a subtle foreshadowing of the events to come (bitter for death, sour for hardship, sweet for romance, salty for maritime adventure, etc, etc). Three bags a day or so and in a few short months you'll have enjoyed not only hundreds of different teas but also an entire novel.

Spacecoyote, Feb 24 2009

Salada Tea's "Taglines" http://soapboxdujou...for-good-cuppa.html
Some thirty billion printed...no novels though. [Spacecoyote, Feb 27 2009]


       Ideal for Proust [+].
nineteenthly, Feb 24 2009

       Hmm...running the numbers this might have to be short stories, not novels. Lets assume one drinks 6 bags worth a day. That's twice of what I said earlier. And lets assume this box is a year's supply. So that means 6 bags a day * 365 days = 2190 sentences. I've read that a small novel is 50,000 words or so. Assuming 22 words per sentence (which is rather much), that makes 48,180 words. So for the highest reasonable estimates, this would just barely constitute a novel. With more reasonable estimates, it certainly would not. Maybe I should stick to audiobooks.   

       Edit: Hmm...Proust's sentences seem to be rather longer on average than 22 words. I think the trouble there would be fitting them all on the tag.
Spacecoyote, Feb 24 2009

       I think the secret is slow reading. It's been said that the essence of reading something philosophically is the slow pace at which one reads it, and also that Philosophy is a branch of literature. Proust, though i refuse to read his work on principle, is all about writing stuff slowly.
In Sartre's "Nausea", if i remember rightly, a character picks up a pebble on a beach and is impressed by its capacity just to be what it is. The impression of a beach could be created by an infusion of kelp.

       In some situations, it can take a whole week of careful reading to get through a single paragraph. This would easily be applicable to that. Right now, i actually envisage something like a book group in a café which serves the right beverage at the right time, maybe also with food and particular odours in the air. Concerning the last point, that needn't be edible or potable stuff. For instance, i imagine a scene, or more likely a whole novel, on a car racing theme being evoked by the smell of petrol or one involving horses involving the smell of manure.
nineteenthly, Feb 24 2009

       //Proust, though i refuse to read his work on principle,// That is one of the most intense principles I've ever come across.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 24 2009

       Also, what happens if you get to "Captain Leatherwicke noticed a faint tang of bitter almonds in the cup of tea his wife had served him, but sipped on oblivious of the consequences...."
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 24 2009

       Benzaldehyde is used in cherry flavoring (aka imitation bitter almond extract) but they leave the cyanide out.   

       Of course, the HHGTTG edition would taste almost, but not quite, entirely unlike tea.
Spacecoyote, Feb 24 2009

       But it's better with the cyanide! Little bit of cyanide never did anyone any harm.   

       My Proust thing is that since i would be unwilling to read what he wrote in French and i try to avoid reading translations, that amounts to never reading him. Also, being quite obsessive, i don't think it would be very healthy for me to read something written by someone else who positively wallows in obsession.
nineteenthly, Feb 24 2009

       I haven't read Cervantes for the same reason, on both counts (if only my Spanish were just a little better).
Spacecoyote, Feb 24 2009

       I haven't read Homer, but only because he never reads anything of mine.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 24 2009

       Maybe there could be a box of biscuits to go along with it (sold separately) that coordinate with plot elements. Looking through the large selection showcased on Nice Cup Of Tea And A Sit Down, there seems to be enough variety.
Spacecoyote, Feb 25 2009

       So, [SpaceCoyote], do you feel you have a tendency to struggle unwittingly against insuperable odds? How can you be aware of being unaware of it?
nineteenthly, Feb 25 2009

       For accuracy, the Proust version should be biscuits. In fact, "Proust biscuits" ought to be a big seller.
hippo, Feb 25 2009

       I've heard that the Bibliotheque Nationale in Paris has a literary-themed café, with, among other things, madeleines soaked in tea. That may just be a rumour as i've not been there.
nineteenthly, Feb 25 2009

       //The flavor could perhaps offer a subtle foreshadowing of the events to come// That's a yes.
Spacecoyote, Feb 25 2009

       + very half-brewed!!
xandram, Feb 25 2009

       Could you not call it "Tea For Tome"?
xenzag, Feb 25 2009

       Textley tea bags...
Two thousand punctuations make a better cup of tea.

       I like this in that it would seem to require a catholic approach to what is considered "tea". I think one would need to rotate in pretty much every available agricultural product to satisfy the need to sample thousands of different "teas". The best part will be the bestowing of stuffy tea names to bags of alfalfa, quackgrass, chickweed, and so on.
bungston, Feb 27 2009

       I thought teas were usually blends, not pure. I was thinking it could transition between different blends, spices flavorings, infusions and etc. included.
Spacecoyote, Feb 27 2009


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