Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Drug O' the Month Club

Snakeoil Subscription Services, Inc.
  (+14, -1)(+14, -1)
(+14, -1)
  [vote for,

There are a wretched lot of homeopathic remedies out there. With so many options, it's hard to know where to begin in finding the cure for what ails you -- even if nothing ails you at all. Who knows, maybe you could be feeling 177% better than you do now. Experimentation is key.

S.S.S., Inc. lets you fill out a brief questionaire to ascertain your food allergies, health ailments, psychosomatic plaints, medical history, hereditary predispositions, favorite color, zodiacal sign, etc., and then compiles a list of interesting herbs and organicals that just might give you that extra "oomph" you've been lacking.

Each month you'll receive a 30-day supply of one of these remedies, shipped discreetly in an unmarked package. Perhaps you'll enjoy Horny Goat Weed this month, and South African Hoodia the next! Reorder the ones you like, or renew your subscription at the end of the year for 12 more pharmaceutical adventures!

nihilo, Jun 09 2006

Panexa http://www.panexa.com/
The cure for all known ills. Except in the case of some squirrels. [wagster, Jun 12 2006]


       Sometimes I think my mother is already on this program.
Eugene, Jun 09 2006

       Eugene, please stop bouncing up and down on your bed. You have school in the morning and I cannot hear the football match!
po, Jun 09 2006

       This month happens to be croissants! +
MoreCowbell, Jun 09 2006

       Helpful for aches, tingling, numbness, lethargy, burning, neuralgia, flatulence, restlessness, dyspepsia, shooting pains, incontinence, that not-so-fresh feeling, swelling, spasm, doldrums, excess spittle, runny stools, prolonged erection, and halitosis.
Use as directed!
nihilo, Jun 09 2006

       Brilliant work.   

       As an aside, a mystery ointment found in a Chinese hotel room touted relief from "scorching", among other seemingly unrelated things.
Texticle, Jun 12 2006

       If you are into Homeopathic medicine, just drink a cup of seawater. It should contain the "essesence" of each and every substance ever to exist on earth.
Galbinus_Caeli, Jun 12 2006

       Including one of my personal favorites: fish pee.
nihilo, Jun 12 2006

       [Galbinus_Caeli], given that homeopathic remedies apparently gain potency when they are diluted then it follows that drinking seawater should cure all ailments known to man, including dehydration!
Salmon Of Doubt, Jun 12 2006

       /did it have the letters K and Y emblazened upon it, perhaps?/   

       It may have. It was mostly in Chinese.
Texticle, Jun 12 2006

       [SoD] exactly my point.
Galbinus_Caeli, Jun 13 2006

       i don't like the idea of promoting quackery in any context. maybe i just resent kevin trudeu and his natural cures they don't want you to know about.   

       of course he's an idiot, so there's a trade off.
tcarson, Jun 14 2006

       Trudeau is more than an idiot, he is a felon. He served several years in prison for selling quack medicines. Which is why he sells a book now.
Galbinus_Caeli, Jun 14 2006

       yeah infomercials about publications are all he can make as long as the ftc bans him from other advertising.
tcarson, Jun 14 2006


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