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Ear Reangler

To give ears the 90* angle they should have.
  (+4, -5)
(+4, -5)
  [vote for,

What's wrong with people's ears? It seems like the great majority of the population have ear defects. Just about everyone's ears lay flat against their heads, in a ridiculous aerodynamic fashion.

This just isn't conducive to good hearing. What good are these appendages when they are best positioned on one's head to hear sounds coming from the left and right sides? The eyes point forward, the nose points forward, the mouth points forward - when and where did the ears go wrong? Should we blame the missing link?

This humble idea is for a simple plastic form that is inserted behind the ear in order to push it away from the head so that it rests at a 90* angle from the cranium. In this manner it will be a forward facing sensory device as it should rightfully be.

cuckoointherye, Jan 28 2005


       Are we going to redesign motorcycle helmets to accomodate?   

       I have some appendages that double as temporary ear angle modifiers.
normzone, Jan 28 2005

       How about something that lets you set your earlobe angle according to the situation. This is what my dog does naturally. When she is scanning the neighborhood, ears are back. When she is focused on one sound, ears are foreward. And she has a million ear positions in between. So your device could have a dial that rotates the earlobes back and forth.
robinism, Jan 28 2005

       This would be great for people who have prominent earlobes. They could wear these and feel normal. It would become fashionable to look like Alfred E. Newman.   

       Also good for displaying piercings.   

       How would they work?
robinism, Jan 28 2005

       Your fingers eh normzone?
cuckoointherye, Jan 28 2005

       At the top of the food chain we humans can afford both aerodynamic otic design and omnidirectional hearing. We do a pretty good job of sensing the direction of the origins of a sound through sophisticated processing downstream from the point of reception even though certain frequencies can fool us, especially if they are of short duration (I offer the infuriating beep of smoke detectors whose batteries are failing as an exhibit).   

       So, while I usually don't care too much about absurdity, my vision of the aesthetics of this idea are so distasteful that they garner a negative vote from me for being ugly without a good reason to be ugly.
bristolz, Jan 28 2005

       Haircut? What's a... haircut?
Detly, Jan 28 2005

       I think [robinism] has it. I want my musculature to modified to allow me to do like a dog or horse does.
normzone, Jan 28 2005

       You know, I share a birthday with him. Not the year part, though.
Detly, Jan 28 2005

       Ill assume you mispelled Prince Charming.
cuckoointherye, Jan 28 2005

       It doesn't matter if you're ears stick out everyone special in their ow.... AHAHAHAHAA YOUR EARS STICK OUT AND YOUR JEALOUS OF EVERYONE ELSE   

       mommi, why can't i look normal like everyone else??   

0_owaffleo_0, Jan 28 2005


       <puts gloves on and gets ready to perform some CPR>
cuckoointherye, Jan 28 2005

       I think we just need to exercise the muscularture [sic]( I had posh doctors) of the ear. After all, isn't ear-waggling just a restricted form of what we want here? We need mini dumbells, shaped to fit the ear. And possibly electro-stimulation built into pillows. And after that, who'd need a magic feather?   

       Talk of earlobes always makes me think of those laughing buddha statues, which make me smile.
moomintroll, Jan 30 2005

       Yes, for just $19.95 you to can join the ranks of the auditorily enhanced, with the new home lobe-otomy kit.   

       I think this is a good invention. Sometimes I put my hands behind my ears so I can hear better. It helps! This invention allows someone to get the benefit of putting their hands behind their ears, while keeping their hands free. It could be a boon to old people.   

       I can "wiggle" my ears, but they don't flap like Dumbo's. The entire ear shifts back about 1/4 inch.
robinism, Jan 31 2005


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