h a l f b a k e r y
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This came to me as I was watching the
janitor in my office building wheel a load
of trash onto the service elevator. My
building already has six perfectly good
trash chutes that go straight down to the
bottom. It's just a matter of moving those
pesky elevator cars out of the way.
the trash directly in the elevator
car and hauling it down is a waste of
resources. Both the building electricity
and the janitor's time. Just give each
janitor a key that will send an elevator to
the floor *above* and open the door. Now
the janitor dumps the trash and continues
As an added bonus, with every trip to the
bottom floor, we smash the garbage down
just a bit more. Again, this happens for
free, as the kenetic energy contained in a
descending elevator car is currently just
wasted by the elevator brakes.
[footzilla, Jun 10 2005]
||Wouldn't this make the lift a rather smelly place?
||On second thoughts, that may not be such a bad idea....
"Say Bub, did you just fart?".
"No Bob, that's just yesterday's trash."
||Ah, ingenious. <Next, a trash container for automotive bumpers--a car-crash compactor.>
||Argh, that is seriously going to stink.
||That key would be really useful for getting rid of someone. Open lift door, throw unfortunate person down lift shaft, squash with lift.
||//really useful for getting rid of someone//
Emilio Estevez, for example.
"What does this 'COMPACT' button do?"
"No don't push that, don't push AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaa!" <crunch>
||This would cause problems when something eventually gets caught on the track the elevator rides on.
||"With garbage piling up in the city's compactors, the sanitation engineers union appears to have the upper hand in negotiations. As hundreds of workers are unable to get the elevators all the way down at the ground floor, complaints are mounting."