h a l f b a k e r yWe don't have enough art & classy shit around here.
add, search, annotate, link, view, overview, recent, by name, random
news, help, about, links, report a problem
browse anonymously,
or get an account
and write.
register,
|
|
|
Shark comes at you you put this 4" diameter by 2' wide hard rubber bar as far into its jaws as you can locking them open. There's a strap that you wrap around its snout and pull tight.
Either that or its biting down automatically tightens the strap.
Maybe it has a timer that releases it after
a few minutes giving you time to get away.
Another idea would be a fish with an airbag in it that blows up when it bites down.
Eh, if it swallows it might be pretty bad for the shark.
"a fish with an airbag in it that blows up"
https://en.wikipedi...wiki/Tetraodontidae
Prior art from nature. [neutrinos_shadow, Aug 29 2022]
Not to be confused with this.
https://playersclos...iant=43171065561304
[doctorremulac3, Aug 30 2022]
[link]
|
| |
No- one will ever steal your shark jaw again. |
|
| |
LOL. Was just thinking about the wording of this. Was expecting to hear "Why would you want to lock the jaw of your emergency shark?" |
|
| |
Is there a free Emergency Tiger Bondage Kit with each purchase? |
|
| |
Tiger Bondage. Good name for a heavy metal band. |
|
| |
I was expecting something more like a telescopic steering-wheel lock, that you use to hold the jaw open. Not as kinky as a ball-gag though... |
|
| |
Yea, thought of that. I think I've seen cartoon characters use that against lions, alligators and the like. Too difficult to get lined up just right though. Don't think you have a lot of time. |
|
| |
You know the puffer fish airbag thing really might be much easier. Just have one at the end of a stick, put it in place, push the button, badda boom. |
|
| |
Teeth should lock it in place eh? |
|
| |
A decoy that looks and smells tastier than the diver? Only problem is you attract more sharks with each one used. |
|
| |
Sharks are an endangered species - let them get on with eating anyone who invades their natural habitat. |
|
| |
I think you misread my idea. This is for people who have an emergency shark that want to make sure their emergency shark's jaw is locked and secure from theft or vandalism. |
|
| |
Why would you want an emergency shark? Put it this way, you don't need one until you do, then at that point it's too late. |
|
| |