Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
h a l f b a k e r y
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Fake mock lawn sprinkler

for water shortage times
  [vote for,

Useful for people with a lawn they can't bear to see go brown and to annoy the neighbours at the same time.

Obviously as a British person, I am aware there can be a condition known as a "water shortage". Obviously, my knowledge of such a thing is purely theoretical, he said typing this with lightly webbed-fingers and pauses to note how fetching the gill slits look on his neighbour this morning.

But, I digress.

The device looks like a sprinkler. At the press of the remote button it extends very thin wires describing a parabola from the top outwards with crystals at intervals. The device vibrates the lines to give a visual effect similar to water being sprinkled out onto the lawn, incidentally flicking green paint onto the parched leaves, in order to try and make them look less parched.

By this act it gives some psychological relief to the lawnee, and makes one of the neighbours come around to complain. After demonstrating the waterless-ness of the device the lawnee is then able to press the other button on the remote, which actually does sprinkle the lawn with water.

not_morrison_rm, Jul 13 2012

Minister for Drought https://en.wikipedi...Government_response
Presumably appointed to exhort his congregation to pray for rain.. [8th of 7, May 14 2016]

toxic green http://assets.inhab...ornia-Drought-2.jpg
To be fair the related page seems to show naturally colored lawns, and my experience is decades old. Furthermore it's possible I just didn't recognize properly painted lawns. Nevertheless, this is the predominant color I've seen. [Voice, May 17 2016]


       Will I spoil this by adding an anno? Wonderful!   

       /very thin wires...with crystals...vibrates/ This sounds like stage magic! I wonder if anyone has ever built a stage fountain along these principles.   

       /makes one of the neighbours come around to complain/ - oh yes. Even better if they complain to the authorities. Although in some areas of the US you might still get tazed for being a smart-aleck.
bungston, May 14 2016

       This is excellent. No first-world country should have water shortages, and people should all ignore hosepipe bans until industry dries up and the alleged government is forced to do something about it.
MaxwellBuchanan, May 14 2016

       ... such as ?   

8th of 7, May 14 2016

       I've seen green-painted lawns but never a color that looks natural. They always look a green that says "touch me to grow an extra limb"
Voice, May 14 2016

       Who grows the extra limb? The toucher or the touched? If the touched, can you please link up an example of that shade of green?
bungston, May 16 2016

       [Voice], can we get a PMS number for that please ?
normzone, May 17 2016


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