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Foiling Foreign Spies

Here's your "diplomat" back
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When you catch a spy / enemy operative / "naval attache" on your soil, it should be expected that he/she can be delivered back to his/her home country embarrassed but unharmed.

UBSSS (UB Secret Service Service) will, for a small fee, catch your suspected spy, wrap it tightly in tinfoil to prevent the escape of any unwanted radiation and deliver it back to its owner, as you would any gift of high end chocolate truffles or last night's leftover duck meat.

When we say we'll foil foreign spies, we mean it.

UnaBubba, Jul 18 2012

Greens Theorem http://en.wikipedia...i/Green%27s_theorem
[normzone, Jul 20 2012]

Reynold the Rapper http://www.youtube....watch?v=XUBU3Fx1mrA
Wut? [normzone, Jul 20 2012]


       Less is more.
MaxwellBuchanan, Jul 18 2012

       Less is the new black.
UnaBubba, Jul 18 2012

       I figured the foil may prevent the accidental irradiation of handlers, of the "foreign diplomat" happens to be carrying polonium, for instance.
UnaBubba, Jul 18 2012

       I've found that the best way to deal with fifth-columnists of any kind is to run into them with motorcycles.
Alterother, Jul 19 2012

       Does that also work with power and telegraph poles, [Alter]?
UnaBubba, Jul 19 2012

       Not that I'm suggesting the Poles would have spies operating in your country, mind you.
UnaBubba, Jul 19 2012

       I haven't tested my method on telephone poles. I admit this was an oversight, but frankly we at the Heathen Institute for Inadvisably Applied Science & Penguin Aerodynamics perceive no chance of treason or espionage being carried out by large pieces of creosote-saturated wood.
Alterother, Jul 19 2012

       //no chance of treason or espionage being carried out by large pieces of creosote-saturated wood   

       Unless of course it's one of a pair, placed outside a faculty window, quantum-entangled, with the other one hooked up to an acoustic rig to catch every word.   

       I propose we form a roster and each person goes around their chosen telegraph pole playing bagpipes to confuse the listeners.
not_morrison_rm, Jul 20 2012

Alterother, Jul 20 2012

       If there is foil wrapping around a pole there will be Reynold's number involved somehow.   

       A second offender might be heard to say, "Curses! Foiled again!"
csea, Jul 20 2012

       What about gravity waves?
not_morrison_rm, Jul 20 2012

       [-] <wince>... run'im through.
FlyingToaster, Jul 21 2012

       This is a terrible idea. If we cover foreign spies with foil how are we going to read their minds? Nice one UB.
rcarty, Jul 22 2012

       Oh, you'd leave their heads sticking out, otherwise you'd be forever referring to the diagram inside the lid of the box, trying to identify what's inside each foil wrapper.
UnaBubba, Jul 22 2012


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