Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Fort Sofa

Sofa fortress.
  (+49, -1)(+49, -1)(+49, -1)
(+49, -1)
  [vote for,

Any couch can be made into a floppy, sub-standard sort of fort. The idea is for a line of them designed and built to perform this function well.

The couch is elephant-gray, but the undersides of the reversible cushions are stencilled with lines that suggest blocks of stone. The backs of the cushions are not flat but formed in a zipper-tooth pattern that meshes with projecting bits of cushion inside the couch. The sides have a projecting spur on one side and a matching gap on the other, allowing them to remain firmly fitted together at all times. During the day, this results in a couch with cushions that do not slide forward annoyingly when you slouch.

At night, after the last guest has left your elegant dinner party (probably having complimented you in passing on the inoffensiveness of your plush gray couch), you strip off the cushions and arrange them into a wall around the back of the sofa. The joins between the cushions keep the 'walls' together and the simple zippertooth pattern on the cushion backs form the crenellations, improving the upholstery fort's appearance and defensibility. You don your newspaper captain's hat and let your mind wander to the carefree days of the Welsh conquest or American colonial warfare, or simply hide from your spouse and responsibilities. Good also for children -- both amusing them and keeping them at a distance.
Monkfish, Jul 13 2002

bring 'em on [hob, May 16 2009]

Cushion Trebuchet http://www.halfbake...Cushion_20Trebuchet
The first accessory. [phoenix, Jul 16 2002, last modified Oct 05 2004]

Carpet moat http://www.halfbake.../idea/Carpet_20moat
The second accessory. [phoenix, Jul 16 2002, last modified Oct 05 2004]

Coffee Table Mantlet http://www.halfbake...e_20Table_20Mantlet
The third accessory. [Aristotle, Jul 19 2002, last modified Oct 05 2004]

Armchair Tank http://www.halfbake...dea/Armchair_20Tank
Another accessory. [Aristotle, Jul 19 2002, last modified Oct 05 2004]


       Well, I really like the practical aspects of the first paragraph of this idea. I am sick and tired of the damn cushions sliding forward.   

       But I've never had problems building a fort with objects found around the home. Although it would be amusing that a couch manufacturer would think of that ahead of time.
polartomato, Jul 13 2002

       Its not a bad idea, but i don't think that the kids will apreciate it. They have playstations, after all. I wouldn't mind one that converts into a pirate ship tho'.
briandamage, Jul 13 2002

       Sounds a bit like giant, soft transformers. Now if the easy chair could be transformed into a dragon...
FarmerJohn, Jul 13 2002

       What fun! How about, damage & john, if instead of sleeper couches (or maybe in combination with) you could pull out themed playsets from your sliding-cushion-resistant couch?
polartomato, Jul 13 2002

       Or pull out a sandbox. When the kids get older, plant some spuds and later dig up couch potatoes.
FarmerJohn, Jul 13 2002

       This is ace. Croissant.
calum, Jul 15 2002

       Croissant for the idea and for the economical subtitle.
hippo, Jul 15 2002

       Alright Mr. BriantheMage - what happens when there is a power failure? A couple of well placed candles and you have yourself a good old fashioned seige going on. Or what about when mom and dad put little spoiled brat with playstation, gameboy, gamecube, dreamcast, x-box, any other gaming system that I can't currently think of; on restriction? God forbid if they were to be left to their own devices. Now Monkfish inc. comes in and starts selling these sofas(couches over here) that encourages imgniation. I'd buy one, we looking for a new couch right now as a matter of fact. Croissie!
barnzenen, Jul 15 2002

       I like how its use for childrens' amusement is essentially an afterthought. Biscuit.
hinkle, Jul 17 2002

       thank you hinkle, I have just noticed the Welsh Conquest tucked in there too - when did that happen exactly?
po, Jul 17 2002

       Also available in the 'musical instrument' section of the Military Themed Furniture Store - (wait for it) - The Pianofort.
hippo, Oct 03 2002

       The soft loud, [hippo]?
bristolz, Oct 03 2002

       This is god-like. I spent large portions of my child hood trying to build the better fort. Ace! Croissant! Damn you autoboner!
Zircon, Oct 04 2002

       How beautiful in both concept and outline. I used to build forts in which to hide from scary movies... like ghostbusters. I wish I'd had one of these.   

       Zircon is right, away foul autoboner... begone. Maybe we should hold an exorcism?
madradish, Oct 04 2002

       Just noticed the category. Tremendous.
my face your, Jan 29 2003

       Oooh, that's new. Like it.
8th of 7, Jan 29 2003

       Mr. Monkfish -- how do you know such vocabulary words as "crenellations?" Wow.
effervescent, Apr 09 2003

       I made something along the same lines out of ordinary sofa bits, and was having great fun battling my Kelpie "Daisy". But then my missus came back from the shops and gave us both a bollocking, maybe I should build a "sofa doghouse" next time....
Micky Dread, Apr 09 2003

       And where ... the hell ... was I ... for this ?.. oh, dear, have a croissant!
Letsbuildafort, Jun 20 2004

       I am very happy that the pastries did not dissapear after the Crash of '04.
Have a belated one (pastry, not crash).

By the way home:warniture has to be the best category name in existence.
methinksnot, May 12 2006

       Awewsome. This would be great for a playroom/ family room. I want one and I don't even have any kids yet. +
NotTheSharpestSpoon, May 12 2006

       Sweeeet. Sofa forts.   

       I'm just gonna cruise on this nostalgia for a little while....
notmarkflynn, May 14 2006

       This is freakin awsome. i want one now. screw that i want every chair in my house to be of that brand. or make my house out of them and if i need i can zipp some off the wall to sit on. either way... bread for you.
Curiosity, May 14 2006

       + //Sweeeet. Sofa forts.// I misread that at first.
Zimmy, Aug 18 2006

       Very cool [hob]. Looks like a *really* fun game now.
blissmiss, May 16 2009


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