Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Fruit and nut kayak

The vegetarian option
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Authentic Inuit boats are made almost entirely from animal products, derived from seals, whales, caribou, etc.

For vegetarians, this is a bit of a no-no.

Now, BorgCo designers have developed a version that is acceptable even to vegans.

Derived entirely from vegetable material, this agile one-person craft has a hull made from dried gourd material, panels stitched together with hemp fibre in a pattern of interlocking plates, and coated with wood pitch derived from pine resin - obtained without harming trees - and, where appropriate, natural rubber. The paddle (included) is a length of bamboo with part of a coco-de-mer husk affixed to each end.

Emergency buoyancy is provided by extra sealed gourds packed into the bow and stern.

The components of the boat are chosen from parts of the plants that they tend to shed naturally, often as part of their process of reproduction*.

Now you too can own your very own fruit and nut kayak ...

* Purchasers are requested to take note of the fact that the components have been treated before and during assembly to make them more durable, and this deprives them of almost all nutritive value. As a result, they should not count on being able, in an emergency, to consume their purchase as survival rations. As a reminder, the top of the craft is printed front and back with the message "You can't have your kayak and eat it".

8th of 7, Nov 13 2012

Vegan piranha (sort of) http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pacu
May contain nuts. [spidermother, Nov 13 2012]

[link]






       Only a fruit with big nuts would get in a BorgCo kayak.
lurch, Nov 13 2012
  

       ^.
FlyingToaster, Nov 13 2012
  

       For non-vegans, a twin-hulled craft made from a combination of albumen/air foam, and some kind of starchy binding material - e.g. sugar. This matrix, once shaped and set would provide a very light form, which, suitably sealed, would be very bouyant, and edible under emergency conditions. Yes, you can both sail your cat-a-meringue and eat it.
zen_tom, Nov 13 2012
  

       I don't quite understand why it's a no-no for vegetarians if they aren't eating the kayak.
xandram, Nov 13 2012
  

       [-] for the pun.   

       [-] again for humouring vegetarians. It only encourages them.
MaxwellBuchanan, Aug 06 2019
  

       Just think of it as "Luring them out into the open, so they can be picked off at leisure".
8th of 7, Aug 06 2019
  

       [xandram]; I think he means "vegans"; no use of any animals products ever for any purpose. EVER! (Vegans are silly.)
neutrinos_shadow, Aug 06 2019
  

       For those who shun the use of both animal and vegetable products, a concrete hull would work fine. Or pressed steel.
pocmloc, Aug 07 2019
  

       Steel-reinforced concrete hulls are WKTE.   

       Is it possible to whittle* a hull from an igneous rock such as granite ?   

       *A fairly durable penknife would be a prerequisite.
8th of 7, Aug 07 2019
  

       I'm considering posting a derivative idea -   

       "You can't have your kayak and eat it" II
normzone, Aug 08 2019
  

       //Is it possible to whittle a hull from an igneous rock such as granite ? // No, but in some regions of Wales they hew coracles from slate.
MaxwellBuchanan, Aug 08 2019
  
      
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