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Honest Car Alarm

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The audible part of the alarm will just have a voice yelling "Wolf! Wolf! Wolf!", as that is the entire effect anyway. Would reduce nuisance.
sophocles, Oct 21 2004


       I think that would be just as annoying as the sirens, beeps, and squawks alarms have now. And what would it say if it really is being jacked? "No, really, this time it's true! It is, it is IT IS!!! You must believe me!" The concept of a car alarm literally crying wolf is funny, though.
Machiavelli, Oct 21 2004

       I saw what looked like someone stealing a car the other day. I wasn't sure though but I considered calling the police. Then I saw that it was a BMW and changed my mind.
harderthanjesus, Oct 22 2004

       Perhaps the system could deliver other fable-based messages to theives should the car be stolen anyway. "Don't pull that face, 'cause if the wind changes..."
vigilante, Oct 22 2004

       Can't they make a car alarm that waits for the _second_ jolt within a short time period before ringing? That would prevent 100% of the alarms we hear today.
phundug, Oct 23 2004

       "Then I saw that it was a BMW and changed my mind."   

       Huh? Are you that brand conscious?
bristolz, Oct 23 2004

       This reminds me of an old technique for stealing a car:
Give the car a thump every night, so that the alarm goes off. Finally the owner will leave the alarm off......
Ling, Oct 24 2004

       No, ling. 0% of car owners can pick their car's alarm out of a test set of 2 alarms.
phundug, Oct 25 2004

       BMW drivers always try to kill me [bristolz]. I don't know why, but whenever someone endangers my life through reckless driving nine times out of ten they're driving a BMW.
harderthanjesus, Oct 25 2004

       [phundug], do you see that car in your driveway with all the lights flashing. Can you hear an annoying sound? That's your car alarm.
Yes you are right, if the car alarm keeps going off, just park the car down the road outside someone else's house.
Ling, Oct 25 2004

       Could the car alarm howl like a wolf instead of saying "Wolf!"? Then we could all pretend it was the old days again. More sensibly, incorporate [phundug]'s 2nd shock policy in an alarm that will allow a customisable recording to be played. This will ensure the owner responds if they're within range, and turn the damn thing off if it's a false positive.
DocBrown, Oct 25 2004

       //I don't know why, but whenever someone endangers my life through reckless driving nine times out of ten they're driving a BMW//   

       Nope, in my experience it's Vectra owners that are the worst.   

       You have to bear in mind that BMWs appear to be set up so the car feels as if it wants to drive slightly faster at any given speed. Sounds daft, but empirically it's true.
egbert, Oct 25 2004

       have the alarm play "it's a small world"
sukiyaki, Aug 06 2007

       you can say that again
evilpenguin, Aug 06 2007

       How about the fable-based security system. The car keys are deposited in a hole in the side of the car. When the thief puts his hand into the hole and grabs the keys, his fist will be too large to remove and the police can apprehend him.   

       Alternatively there could be a keypad where the would-be thief has to guess your name. If he succeeds he gets the car, otherwise he has to work in your cellar.
marklar, Aug 06 2007

       Like it [+]
theleopard, Aug 06 2007

Voice, Jul 13 2008


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