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Ikea Pianö

The Acoustic Piano for the 21st Century... by Ikea
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Add a touch of elegance to your home entertainment space with the Ikea Pianö: our fashionable and affordable take on the world's most popular musical instrument. Jazz away with Jöplin, Rock on with Rachmaninöff and Liberate your Liberace[1].

So let's take a look at this modern masterpiece of a timeless piece of music history...

Note the wide bevelling of all external edges: a flowing shape, the complement of any architectural stylings. The 73 full-sized Ivöry[2] keys provide a musical range that easily accomodates the most popular pieces of the last 500 years, yet the svelte width can fit the most intimate space: the Pianö is a full two feet thinner than any of the previous century's offerings.

Now we *could* be describing the external trappings of a digital piano, available from many musical instrument manufacturers. But we're not.

The Ikea Pianö is a real acoustic piano.

Good things come in small packages and, to prove it, the front panels of the Pianö continue down directly from the keybed front, providing an interior reverberant chamber equivalent to a full-sized upright grand. You may note the bold design of the curved pedal alcove, topped by a semicircular lintel. Four layers of lacquer provide a mirror finish.

The harp[3] and body-frame components are constructed of an aluminum alloy for lightness, durability and sound conductance, while Bamböö[4] is utilized not only for the soundboard[5] but also lines the inside of the composite body panels. A beautiful instrument, inside and out.

But the next generation of piano isn't limited to a purely acoustic sound generation! Read on...

The Enhanced Pianö System:

The visible portion of the EPS looks like, and is, a fashionable, colour-coordinated LED Clock[6] perched atop the Pianö. With the touch of a switch however, the EPS can make the already beautiful sounding instrument sound even better.

Optical microswitches under the keys and piezoelectric pickups/actuators on the harp combine with the very latest in digital technology. You can...

• increase the volume to match the full drumkit your friend brought along

• lower the volume to a musical whisper: private practice or ambience for a quiet tete a tete

• simulate several different types of acoustic keyboard instruments... using real strings as the modulated source.

• add a very natural chorusing (sound thickening) or slight detuning (honkytonk) effect

• add several types of reverberation and echo effects, again right at the source of the sound.

For the discerning performer the Pianö has not only the ubiquitous mechanical damper pedal found on all modern pianos, but includes a pedal that controls EPS functions. You can:

• use it to fade in/out the EPS to vary the working tone or volume in different passages

• use it as a Sostenuto pedal! that's right, a feature found only on concert grand behemoths.

The EPS can also function as a tuning aid (the Ikea Pianö is a real acoustic piano and occasionally needs to be tuned), and a music-score light when needed.

And, because it's an Ikea, you can not only bring it home on or, in most cases, in your vehicle, but the usual small army of movers, and consequently home repair people, will not be required.


The Ikea Pianö comes in 7 Flatpack(tm) boxes varying in weight from 5 to 85 pounds:

• Soundboard
• Harp
• Strings, Tuning Wrench
• Keyboard
• Hammers
• Frame & Pedal Assemblies
• EPS Module, Assembly Components (Detailed Instructions, Pianö-specific string-torque wrench), Owner's Manual & Warranty(3 years)

Dimensions: 48" x 52" x 24"
Gross Weight: 149 pounds


[1] Full Liberace Liberation not available in all countries; inquire at your local Moral Majority Headquarters for confirmation.

[2] Ivöry(tm) is an ecologically conscious, carefully manufactured synthetic ivory, only available on the Ikea Pianö.

[3] The harp is the conductive framework of the strings.

[4] Bamböö is a durable hardwood, specially umlautted by Ikea exclusively for the Pianö.

[5] The soundboard is the piano's "speaker".

[6] Please see pp. 278-284 for our full range of Clocks and Timepieces.

FlyingToaster, Aug 06 2010

a more tongue-in-cheek alternative posting Self-Assembly_20Grand_20Piano
[FlyingToaster, Aug 06 2010]

A real EPS for electric guitar. http://www.wired.co...06/moog-unveils-ba/
electronic self-oscillation produces infinite sustain [FlyingToaster, Aug 06 2010, last modified Nov 28 2014]

The Hindenburg Grand http://www.airships...og/hindenburg-piano
Made by Julius Blüthner Pianofortefabrik [Cedar Park, Aug 06 2010]

Martin aluminum acoustic guitar http://www.elderly..../items/000CEALT.htm
Maybe aluminum isn't a bad choice. [LoriZ, Aug 12 2010]

Yamaha U1-TA https://www.youtube...watch?v=3VviY3m8v4M
uses the soundboard and strings as a speaker. [FlyingToaster, Nov 28 2014]


       [IT]... you started reading from the last paragraph again didn't you.   

       [edit: filched your colour chart and bullet points, looks good]
FlyingToaster, Aug 06 2010

       ....and a very simple version for playing the "One Note Samba" +
xenzag, Aug 06 2010

       Is there a matching candelabrum ?   

8th of 7, Aug 06 2010

       //candelabraum// sound-sensitve fibre optics display, available separately or with the LED sequinned gown, at a discount.   

       This is actually 2 posts in one.   

       First the Ikea bit, which is a working flatpack piano for people who don't want the absolutely incredible pain-in-the-arse of moving even an apartment-sized piano.   

       The other bit is the "EPS" concept: volume and tone envelopes by reinforcement and cancellation right on the strings: Moogs "infinite sustain guitar" translated onto a working acoustic piano, plus some. Could do waay more than the "simple" sostenuto and stuff mentioned in the post.   

       Okay, bamboo probably wouldn't work for a soundboard but two ö's in a row were too hard to resist. Also, aluminium might not be a good choice either. Being IKEA the rest of the piano would be plywood (fibreboard wouldn't work at all), so not too much in the way of conductive resonance, but having the bottom layer of the plywood be hardwood, combined with a metal structural frame would provide a bit, and the large interior space would provide decent chamber resonance.   

       It's not a CP70 though: those have no "unplugged" sound at all... however a "hardened" roadworthy Pianö might be a modern CP70 alternative if you didn't mind having to assemble the piano for each gig and having the roadies pissed off at you at the total weight of the thing.
FlyingToaster, Aug 06 2010

       It should be called Bobby.
zeno, Aug 06 2010

       Even if it is only 73 notes (which is too short for pieces I play), it will have to weigh far more than the noted 149 pounds to include a frame, strings, soundboard and action. The piano aboard the Hindenburg was almost entirely aluminum and weighted 356 pounds. <link>   

       It is also dangerous to give a non-technician piano wire and a tuning wrench. The tensions involved in stringing a piano combine to forces over 20 tons.
Cedar Park, Aug 06 2010

       // It is also dangerous to give a non-technician piano wire and a tuning wrench. //   

       That in itself more than justifies the idea....
8th of 7, Aug 06 2010

       //73 notes// very rare classical piece that would need the full 88; size octave F to F is classic "stage electric piano", though an E-E or G-G might suit some players better.   

       //Hindenburg...356lbs// that was an 88-key baby grand. Grands usually weight between 600-900 pounds.   

       This is a 73 key small upright, with the (lighter) upright action, probably half a foot taller than an apartment-sized piano and almost two feet thinner... so while 192 lbs was just something I pulled out of the first available orifice, it's in the ballpark.   

       Say roughly 50 lbs for the action, 80 for the harp, and the rest is mostly 0.25" plywood with a hardwood veneer on the inside of the body.
FlyingToaster, Aug 06 2010

       I didn't see the mention about having tone similar to a full-sized upright grand. There's a few problems here, still:   

       Continuing the cabinet straight down from the piano's keybed will do little to increase the tone. It's the volume of the soundboard and the speaking length of the strings that affect the tone the most. It will also make playing the piano as awkward as using a solid box for a dining table. There's no place for your knees, not to mention the pedals.   

       You mentioned 2 feet slimmer, but the difference between an 88 note and 73 note piano is only about 8 inches.
Cedar Park, Aug 07 2010

       well, the post was pretty long without all the technical details, but as long as you're asking:   

       - 10 lesser white notes..... -9.5 inches
- no cheek blocks..... -12 inches
- 0.375" thick sides instead of 1.25"..... -1.75 - inches
- translation from Engineering to Marketing: - 0.75 inches.

       The Pianö is taller than an apartment-sized piano (but still shorter than a full upright), as previously mentioned because of the lack of cheek blocks: the strings have to be more vertically oriented.   

       //volume of the soundboard// which is why the interior of the Pianö is a hardwood veneer layer and the panels are joined by a metal frame: to increase the effective area of the soundboard somewhat. Bear in mind that even with just the harp-mounted board, the area isn't that much less than an apartment model, and the bass doesn't go down that far either.   

       The large internal volume is there for the same reason as bass speakers' deep cabinets. I wanted to say there'd be some other reflective surfaces inside to even out the tone but I wouldn't know where to begin technically.   

       //knees// continue reading that same paragraph in the post :)
FlyingToaster, Aug 07 2010

       // aluminium might not be a good choice either. //   

       Titanium. Light, very strong, very stiff.
8th of 7, Aug 07 2010

       ^, very expensive: you'd have to have the frame on the outside of the instrument in order to justify the cost. (I think that would be out of Ikea's league too)   

       //tone similar to a full-size upright grand//Well, it wouldn't, would it: bit of a difference between a 3foot farmed-wood soundboard and a 5foot harvested-from-the-wild one. I think we could manage a decent apartment-size-piano tone (if somewhat treble-heavy), if the design and components were well sourced and consistent.
FlyingToaster, Aug 08 2010

       Got my upright for 200 bucks off eBay...cost another 200 just to get it home two suburbs away. Flat pack is def the way to go.
simonj, Aug 12 2010

       aaaaand Yomama comes out with the techie half of this post <link> in their new U1-TA. The (strictly acoustic) U1 lists at $7.5k and their kickass top-of-the-line (professional) digital (CP-1) is $6k, so somebody tell me how this thing is $16k ... it sure ain't from the royalties they're (not) paying me.   

       But I think they really did miss a trick not going for a 73/76 key version.
FlyingToaster, Nov 28 2014


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