Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Job insourcing

some one else to sit at my desk kill time and earn
  (+1, -2)
(+1, -2)
  [vote for,

Well it has been quit long since I have had a stable concreat, streaching assignment....I figured out if I give per hour charge to some body to sit at my desk and he asks for help on telephone if needed (Matching my intellect) and I lend help when needed and get couple of these kind of jobs at plum salaries...it will do good for the countries economy ...May be officess should make this kind of thing official ...it will definitly bring down frustration and enhance productivity when needed.
smooth operator, Aug 16 2004

Alternately... http://www.halfbake...ffice_20Accessories
Pretend you're still in the office with one of the 'bakery's most popular ideas. [Fishrat, Oct 04 2004]


       Welcome to the bakery.   

       What job do you do, that you are only required for a small fraction of the time? If my employees tried this, I'd be left wondering if they were really necessary.   

       Careful on the spelling and grammar.
david_scothern, Aug 16 2004

       Galling parody.
jurist, Aug 16 2004

       Thanks david, The point is not whom I work for but if you are totally ignorant that people at plush offices are really short of work many a times?
smooth operator, Aug 16 2004

       I have generally found that people whom I've hired who found themselves "short of work" were usually either short of ambition, short of imagination, short of intelligence, occasionally short of necessary communication skills, or just plain short of common sense. In each of these cases, it was easy to designate those employees as "short of term".
jurist, Aug 16 2004

       If you are an equity participant in the firm, then the hours are of little matter. If not, then either negotiate your way into an equity position or insist on a more realistic shift of hours worked. There's nothing wrong with working a standard 8 hour shift from 4pm till midnight, if that's the requirement of the business and all parties are in agreement.What is wrong is to require frequent or routine overages beyond the standard eight hours without equity participation or some other form of especial compensation.
jurist, Aug 16 2004

       Sort of off topic: I recently read a story of a US SDE who telecommuted, writing code at home in a full time position for a largish software house. After a couple of months, he opted to outsource his work to an SDE in India and, just a few weeks later, had the project running so well that he spent only one to two hours a day managing and reviewing the efforts of the offshore coder who was doing most of the work.   

       He was paying the overseas developer about one-fourth of his full-time salary, so, he began taking on outside work and offshoring that work as well.   

       He eventually got caught by his employer and fired for, primarily, NDA violations but I thought it an interesting tale, (if true).
bristolz, Aug 16 2004

       I’m writing a novel, but to save time I’ve hired an Indian national to do some of it, like from page 2 to 299 (since publishers read only the first page). It was supposed to be an all-American love story, but the guy had trouble, big trouble. Like this passage:

“So, Mr. Gandhi, I see that your wife is on fire.”
“Yes, oh yes. She is burning most readily.”
“Did you use petrol?”
“No no, lighter fluid.”
“You find that better?”
“It is more traditional.”
“Yes, you are right. It is best to be traditional.”

After pages of garbage like that, I fired him. I couldn’t believe it. “It’s not petrol,” I yelled, “it’s GASOLINE.”
Damn foreigners!
ldischler, Aug 16 2004

       // gasoline. //   


       In my line of work, because of the rather complicated product cycle development time, work goes in spurts and cycles. 3 out of 5 months or so I'll be racing around like a headless chicken on speed, and the other 2 I'll be twiddling my fingers waiting on other people's projects to feed answers to my own.
RayfordSteele, Aug 16 2004

       Hey [smooth]... don't talk to them, listen to me! I'll take the job!!!
Pericles, Aug 17 2004

       [Pericles] ready for relocation...guess what ? to India? and others who are not, so to say - "in agreement with outsourcing" and specially [idischler] with not so good taste of Indian creative writing.   

       Would like to ask if you feel you are so competetive why is that 40% of NASA are Indain nationals and why 100% of software designed to run America have a Indian hand.   

       Well I strongly feel [idischler] should not insource or outsource for as you know...Empty mind is a devils workshop.   

       Further rock this (All isensitive baddies watch your finger)   

       Be sober be watchfull your adversary the devil prowls like a roaring Lion seeking someone to devour.   

       [idischler] please tell me where does it come from???
smooth operator, Aug 17 2004

       I'm finding [ldischler]'s story and the fact that [operator] is Indian to be highly amusing. Ah, the irony. No offense to either of you.
Machiavelli, Aug 17 2004

       Well, [smooth], it's Biblical in any case. New Testament, though to my shame I'm not sure where from exactly.
david_scothern, Aug 17 2004

       I Peter 5:8
Machiavelli, Aug 18 2004


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