Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Ketchup squeezer-outer

The end of ketchup dispensing woes.
  [vote for,

Mankind has long been plagued by the thick red glop's reluctance to leave its container. You all know the scenario, shaking the bottle, poking a butter knife in the bottle to start the flow, etc.

I believe that the problem could be solved by a new type of container that makes use of existing dispensing technology. Think giant sized Chap Stick container, with a hole in the lid - a cylinder with a hole on one end (possibly a flip top lid like a regular ketchup squeeze bottle) and a piston driven by a screw mechanism inside. A simple twist of the screw mechanism on one end of the cylinder forces the ketchup out the hole in the other end of the cylinder.

Properly designed, this would also have the benefit of dispensing nearly every bit of the product out of the container unlike pumps or typical bottles.

Dispensing could be done with much more class than the current methods. Like freshly ground pepper or grated cheese, "Would sir like ketchup on his filet mignon this evening?"

half, Sep 13 2002

The inspiration http://www.halfbake...etchup_20Centrifuge
It *had* to be easier than this. [half, Sep 13 2002, last modified Oct 05 2004]

Gravity's solution: baked http://www.heinz.co...squeeze_ketchup.jpg
[XSarenkaX]'s one step behind the brilliant minds at Heinz [aden, Oct 01 2002, last modified Oct 05 2004]

Carbonated Ketchup. http://www.halfbake...arbonated_20ketchup
Pressurized container. [Cedar Park, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 05 2004]


       I like this idea. I think it's partially baked somewhere out there... You could also dispense ketchup in a dispenser kind of like those handsoap pumps... just a thought. Several fast food chains already use a similar technique. Maybe sir would like a tomato paste grinder for sprinkling tomato puree? On second thought maybe not.
polartomato, Sep 13 2002

       So, [polartomato] eats ketchup. Cannibalism?
half, Sep 13 2002

       . . . but not _white_ ketchup.
bristolz, Sep 13 2002

       <as creepy music plays in the background and intermittent maniacal screams fill the air, along with the sound of tomatoes being squished> The horror. Freeze your mutilated tomatoes and see how easily white ketchup can be arranged for.   

       On third thought that sounds like your average Gallagher show.
polartomato, Sep 13 2002

       Isn't this just a caulking gun filled with ketchup ?   

       <Thinks: Hmmmm. What a weapon to have in a food fight ... >
8th of 7, Sep 13 2002

       //You could also dispense ketchup in a dispenser kind of like those handsoap pumps// and, indeed, many people do. I've seen these in some aspiring burger bars in the UK.
PeterSilly, Sep 13 2002

       //Isn't this just a caulking gun filled with ketchup ?//
half, Sep 13 2002

       I pictured it more like those upright toothpaste pump dispensers, where the bottom slowly creeps up inside the rigid tube as you dispense.
XSarenkaX, Sep 13 2002

       Wonderful idea.   

       I consider myself a generous person for saying this, because I know the abuse that my fiance's ketchup monsters will inflict on the elegant form of this invention.   

       The eleven-year-old will dispense the ketchup into the mayonnaise bottle, and then stir vigorously to make "secret sauce".   

       The six-year-old will simply plant the dispenser on the edge of the dinner table, put her face under it, and dispense the ketchup directly into her mouth.   

       But I can't blame the product for the behavior, can I? That's right; I can't. Croissant.
1percent, Sep 13 2002

       "Ketchup Monsters". Heh.
Hmm...I might try the six year old's approach myself.
half, Sep 16 2002

       11 year old destined to be a chemist   

       6 year old destined to be a half-baker   

       +1 to [half] for this
po, Sep 16 2002

       Off-topic: when everyone else would tell me the chocolate milk mix (in the squeezable bottle) was gone, I would confidently pour the milk into the bottle, shake the bottle, pour it into my tall glass, and have the chocolatiest milk ever. Yum.
globaltourniquet, Sep 27 2002

       What's wrong with those inverted bottles with the cap at the very bottom? There are shampoo bottles and sunblock bottles shaped like this. Just redesign the plastic ketchup bottles so the solid leak-proof cap is on the bottom of the bottle and stand it on the cap all the time. Every bit of ketchup should funnel into the cap's hole if it's kept "upright", on it's cap-bottom. Gravity is the cheapest mechanism.
XSarenkaX, Sep 27 2002

       You know what really dismays me, the bakery, the most creative commuity in the world, with the whiniest, pickiest, pettiest, wimpiest members anywhere, let someone else discover, create, and produce the "Crustless Mustard Container".   

       No more little yellow circles of hardened mustard everytime you open it, no thanks to us. We are a disgrace to the condiment cause.
blissmiss, Oct 02 2002

       The extra mechanism is worth more than the little bit of ketchup you would save, and the ketchup biodegrades while the mechanism would become another bit of junk on the forever pile. Use a simple glass bottle and recycle it when you've knocked 95 percent of the ketchup out of it.
horripilation, Nov 07 2002

       <Sigh> Just follow the instructions on the bottle and SHAKE it. The longerwise you shake it, the thinlier it gets.
egbert, Nov 19 2002

       Why the pump.. or push.. or whatever??... why not just pressurize the canister like "Ready-Whip", with one of the pipes leading to the top. Just shoot it. Maybe even make if fun for sappy older men that enjoy novelty items- make it into a gun or something. Who the hell knows? If so... I'd want a holster.
Siefdog, May 15 2003

       Ketchup-ball as a sport...oy. I don't even want to go there.   

       The problem with this is the extra mechanism. Either you build it into the bottle (which is gonna be one-use anyway), or you sell an expensive (relatively speaking) separate caulk gun thinger. In the latter scenario, I envisagion all sorts of M$-type compatible generics and lawsuits. Neutral.   

       We shake and/or dilute our ketchup when it gets near-empty, FWIW.
galukalock, May 15 2003

       I was in a McDonalds that had a pressurized ketchup dispenser. It was most unexpected, but very cool. I think ketchup in a "toothpaste type" tube is a great idea. I am wondering if I could re-use one. hmm.
Zimmy, May 15 2003

       Reminds me of [po]'s idea for carbonated ketchup. I seem to remember it like it was only yesterday (dreamy look in eyes, vision getting hazy, harp arpeggios playing....) [link]
Cedar Park, May 16 2003

       I like my ketchup-siphoning-with-a-straw method better.
oatcake, May 16 2003


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