Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Landmark Diags

Cross motor traffic the most direct route possible.
 
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In the time-honoured recognition that the pedestrian always comes first, herein will be proposed a system to make roads wholely the dominion of pedestrians.

For a start, every crosswalk button would in fact show photographs of landmarks -- statues, markets, street musicians, etc -- standing somewhere across the street, up and down a .5 - 1 km row of street-facing landmarks. These photographs of landmarks would be automatically updated by a builtin camera, naturally.

Should the pedestrian press the image of a girl standing on a corner with large breasts (not together exactly), a series of lights, constantly blinking yellow up and down the street, would then coordinate to turn red in precisely the right sequence so that the pedestrian can walk diagonally -- that is, directly -- across stopped traffic and to his or her destination most expediently.

Would this manage to enrage salty, a self-loving, machine propelling life form? Does a dog have sex at midnight? Ask yourself that.

4and20, Oct 05 2020

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       // the pedestrian always comes first, //   

       Actually, our preferred targets are cyclists, then cats, then squirrels. The latter two score highly, because they're small, fast vermin - but in terms of cleansing the environment - particularly roads - of vermin, cyclists need to be the first to go.   

       Pedestrians are fairly low down the scoring system.   

       // Does a dog have sex at midnight? //   

       What if the dog did nothing in the night-time ... ?
8th of 7, Oct 05 2020
  

       Oddly enough, it's the virgins who make the most noise at night.
4and20, Oct 05 2020
  

       Personally, I don't like pressing the button, I cross* with the vehicles green, in the parallel flow.   

       *always cautiously and giving way to free turn vehicles of course.
//Does a dog have sex at midnight?// Given the opportunity and capability, yes. Otherwise it would be an abhorrence against nature.
wjt, Oct 09 2020
  

       I don't understand. Why would the girls large breasts not be together exactly?   

       //girl standing on a corner with large breasts//

Ah, I wondered why a corner would have large breasts...
hippo, Oct 09 2020
  

       // Why would the girls large breasts not be together exactly? //   

       If you have to ask, you're too young to know ...   

       There are these special private clubs for gentlemen, you see ...
8th of 7, Oct 09 2020
  
      
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