Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Marble Keyboard

A New Asthetic
  (+40, -2)(+40, -2)(+40, -2)
(+40, -2)
  [vote for,

Keyboards are plasticy, tacky things with an air of cheapness about them. Go forth someone! and carve me a keyboard out of mahogany and set within it keys of finest marble!. And get someone to engrave the letters into the keys. Futher to this; as a geologist, I'd like to see keys made out of a rock the name of which starts with the letter of the key. Anorthosite, Basalt, Cummingtonite (a mineral, no seriously), Dunite etc.... Maybe the base that the keys are set into could be a natural piece of lava flow, rather than wood.

As with a piano, the tactical deployment of felt would reduce un-required klackyness. And I had another thought, this idea would require the creation of another one of thos little battery powered keyboard tools, (I have a vacuum already) thats right! a polisher!. And now I'm also thinking of a laminated wood key board with a type of wood that matches each letter, Ash, Beech, Cedar, etc...(less environmentally friendly I know, maybe recycled wood?)

Zircon, Aug 29 2002

(?) "Marble keyboard" http://www.thiemo.net/misc/kezboard/
(Not real marble though) [angel, Aug 29 2002, last modified Oct 04 2004]

(??) Marble Mouse http://www.worklink...logitechmarble.html
;) [DrCurry, Aug 29 2002, last modified Oct 04 2004]

(??) Try these guys http://www.oberhofer.com/start.cfm
(And if you understand their site interface, you're a better man than me.) [angel, Aug 29 2002]

(??) Cummingtonite http://mineral.gall...mmingt/cummingt.htm
[calum, Aug 29 2002]

(??) The TARDIS secondary control room http://www.crosswin...trolroom/index.html
see anno below for explanation [Zircon, Aug 29 2002, last modified Oct 04 2004]

C & W heritage centre (That's Cable & Wireless, not Country & Western) http://www.porthcurno.org.uk/
For fans of mahogany and brass. [angel, Aug 30 2002, last modified Oct 04 2004]

(??) Zee is for Zircon http://mineral.gall...e/zircon/zircon.htm
Zirconium Silicate. [Zircon, Aug 30 2002, last modified Oct 04 2004]

(??) dictionary http://imcg.wr.usgs.gov/dmmrt/
[lewisgirl, Aug 30 2002, last modified Oct 04 2004]

(??) RSM http://union.ic.ac.uk/rsmu/
Toujours, toujours, pour Bacchus et ses amours... we're royal miners all. [lewisgirl, Sep 04 2002, last modified Oct 04 2004]

(?) CSM http://www.ex.ac.uk/CSM/
(In the interests of completeness) [angel, Sep 04 2002, last modified Oct 04 2004]

(??) Try these guys http://www.oberhofer.com/
(And if you understand their site interface, you're a better man than me.) [angel, Oct 04 2004]

(??) "Natural" keyboard http://www.tasweb.c...eb/English/exec.htm
Executive tastes catered for :Ahem: [p1stonbroke, Oct 04 2004]

The Wooden Computers of Nepal http://news.bbc.co....ci/tech/1606580.stm
One of the less well known wonders of the modern world. [PainOCommonSense, Oct 04 2004]

White marble hydrographed keyboard https://www.reddit....nrzov/white_marble/
[notexactly, Dec 18 2018]


       As with a piano, the tactical deployment of felt would reduce un-required klackyness. And I had another thought, this idea would require the creation of another one of thos little battery powered keyboard tools, (I have a vacuum already) thats right! a polisher!. And now I'm also thinking of a laminated wood key board with a type of wood that matches each letter, Ash, Beech, Cedar, etc...(less environmentally friendly I know, maybe recycled wood?)
Zircon, Aug 29 2002

       Years and years ago (back before Windows, anyway), I came acros a service that customized PCs and Macs, taking the plastic shells of the computer, monitor and keyboard, and giving them a very realistic faux finish, in marble, mahogany, steel, and a host of other options. Seems to me that is more practical.   

       (I've had a few keyboards fall on me while squirreling under desks or poking about in data center cabinets; I suspect I wouldn't be here to tell about it if one of them had been made out of marble.)
DrCurry, Aug 29 2002

       But if they'd been made out of marble they probably would have been too heavy to slide and fall in the first place....
Zircon, Aug 29 2002

       It's perfectly practicable; and it probably has been done somewhere - just a matter of smoeone with more money than sense being prepared to put up the cash. Stone keytops would have to be pretty thin to keep the inertia down but I guess it would feel good (if tiring ) to type on. A swirly agate keyboard would be stylish. Personally, I'd like a titanium keyboard.   

       Croissant anyway.
8th of 7, Aug 29 2002

       [DrCurry] I have that very mouse, what you 'ave linked to there. It's great, if you get bored you can take the ball out and throw it around.
Zircon, Aug 29 2002

       I truly hope that some enterprising soul bakes this excellent idea. At present, I find that my plastic, taupe-coloured computer really buggers up the air of sophistication that my dress and decor engender. What use are spats, top hats and persian cats when there is a styleless bakelite monstrosity lurking in the corner of one's otherwise perfectly appointed study?   

calum, Aug 29 2002

       //styleless bakelite monstrosity lurking//
Have you met my Gran?
Jinbish, Aug 29 2002

       Yes, tell her to stay out of my study.
calum, Aug 29 2002

       Sorry about that. I've told her time and time again not to lurk.   

       Don't worry though..as long as your name isn't 'Sarah Conner' you should be safe from harm.
Jinbish, Aug 29 2002

       Re: Angel's link...I understand it, don't like it, but I understand it. Wish they had some pictures of actual products other then the one.   

       For some reason I thought this was going to be about a keyboard with round, marble shapes for the keys.
barnzenen, Aug 29 2002

       Yeah, I was thinking about that until i realised that all the keys on my key board are slightly concave. so I think that rounded keys wouldn't be much fun on the finger tips. The only key which is convex is the space key. Can anyone tell me why?
Zircon, Aug 29 2002

       [barnzenen]: I wanted to know about keyboards, it tried to tell me about kitchens. I gave up shortly after that.
angel, Aug 29 2002

       [Zircon] I'm guessing here...but the space bar is generally hit with the sides of your thumbs - most of the other keys are depressed withe the tips of your fingers.   

       If the space bar were concave then your thumbs would be hitting the edges of the curve.   

       That's my hypothesis.
Jinbish, Aug 29 2002

       [angel] I think it wants you to have a keyboard in the kitchen. I hope the have osme kind of innovative answer to the crumbs down the sides of the key proplem. Olive oil, and raw egg down sides of keys has got to be alot worse.   

       [Jinbish] That is so obvious now you come to mention it, isn't it? A concave space bar would probably give you caluses after a while.

       How about a keyboard in imitation antique furniture style, beautiful turned wood, carved filgree on the edges, and little queen anne feet at each corner.This to a normal keyboard would be as the alternative TARDIS control room to the normal one.(see link)
Zircon, Aug 29 2002

       Truly inspiring zircon. If you used quartz or other semi-precious stones to make not only keyboard, but box and screen, then it would absorb harmful electromagnetic radiation too. Big croissant with almond chips =+)
jumblebox, Aug 29 2002

       Yeah, Oberhofer likes the kitchen, thats all. About the marbles for the keys, I thought it would be kinda like those beaded seat liners you always see cabbies with. They are suppose to massage you while you drive. I just thought the marbles would massage your fingers somehow. Don't ask me, I was just trying to think what the idea was before I read it. I kinda like my idea anyway so sppptttt! :P
barnzenen, Aug 29 2002

       except the medical instruments, ravenswood. ((((shudder))))
po, Aug 29 2002

       Very nice. You would have to add a flexible rubber "shield" between the keys so dirt doesn't fall into them, making your $300+ Keyboard worthless.   

       Marble Trackball would be appealing, though.
BinaryCookies, Aug 29 2002

       Keyboard made of a deep polished rosewood, and the key letters inlaid with mother-of-pearl. And a miniature brass rail running the length of the front to rest your wrist on, and the spacebar could be soft leather upholstered. Key counterweights would give a smooth action.
waugsqueke, Aug 30 2002

       Now a marble dvorak keyboard, thats an idea....
hexan, Aug 30 2002

       I like [waugs]' version. I could also go for a keyboard with circular keys like really old typewriters, and a mouse based on a telegraph key.
Steampunk fans may care to check my link to Porthcurno museum. They have some superb gear there.
angel, Aug 30 2002

       I'd like an ornate cast iron keyboard on a pedal sewing machine type table, but the keys would be brushed stainless steel. Or maybe the keyboard should be like a large udder with a long teat to be pulled for each character.
FarmerJohn, Aug 30 2002

       Feeling a little silly this morning. Orignially, I was intending to list a rock/mineral for each key, but didn't when I realised I couldn't think of anything for 'Q' until [jumblebox] mentioned quartz. Most obvious of all minerals. D'oh! Then I couldn't think of anything for 'Z' I'll let y'all figure why this makes me feel even sillier.............
Zircon, Aug 30 2002

       [UB] I think you mean Zeolite. And yes, zircon is a mineral; see link
Zircon, Aug 30 2002

       There's no reason that you can't actually make a computer keyboard that looks like the manuals of a Wurlitzer organ ..... interesting "look-and-feel". Have to put on Dinner Jacket & Bow Tie to type a memo, though. Pianists and organists manage a prety fearsome data input rate a times ...
8th of 7, Aug 30 2002

       Then hook each key up so that it plays a different note, and learn to play a nice piece of piano music...Eg 'the maple leaf rag'. When your finished look up at the screen and maybe, just maybe something intelligable will be written. It might even be an idea fit for the halfbakery. ("Ford, there's an infinate number of monkeys outside that want to talk to us about a script for Hamlet they've worked out")
Zircon, Aug 30 2002

       Sorry [UB] I didn't mean to snap. I forgot about zoolites. I took the path away from palaeo along time ago. Now a whole keyboard made out of fossils would be cool, but I worry about geological conservation so maybe not.
Zircon, Aug 30 2002

       Quartz, Wollastonite, Epidote, Rhodolite, Topaz, Yamatoite, Uvarovite, Illite, Olivine, Peridot

Almandine, Sphene, Demantoid, Forsterite, Glauconite, Hanléite, Jade, Kyanite, Liebenbergite

Zietrisikite, Xenocryst, Chloritoid, Vesuvianite, Baltimorite, Norbergite, Magnetite.

I suspect this idea was all a thin veil as an excuse to have a public giggle about Cummingtonite.
lewisgirl, Aug 30 2002

       [lewisgirl] you wouldn't happen to be a fellow rock botherer would you?
Zircon, Aug 30 2002

       -- The whole bottom row is convex keys. -- I pictured a wood casing, with marble shaped keys, just as Zircon described it. The I thought that maybe I had seen that sort of thing in a movie or tv show somewhere, but couldn't figure out where! Any ideas?
Grabber, Aug 30 2002

       "The Flintstones" ?
8th of 7, Aug 30 2002

       Maybe. My first thought is startrek. Or maybe it's a mental visual from Hitchhikers. A technical person lightly touching a series of marbles, and a door opening, or a screen of information popping up. Very graceful and beautiful, quite unlike the Flintstones. Though that could be a variation on the idea. Rough cut rocks, perfect to lend a stone-age air to any home office.
Grabber, Aug 30 2002

       Good thing I saw this one when I don't have the money to do it. Otherwise my tower case would be in mahogany by now.
RayfordSteele, Aug 30 2002

       So, we convert to paperless offices to save the trees, then we chop down all the rainforests to get tropical hardwoods to make our desks, and chairs, and now the cases for our IT equipment.........   

       I give it 6 months before you can buy a cheap IKEA PC tower in stained pine with an ATX PSU .....
8th of 7, Aug 30 2002

       <Geek-Angering Statement>   

       Computers are in general tacky and clunky things, and this idea is a step in the right direction. Computers shouldn't need to be covered up by elaborate cupboards and cabinets. Your PC should be a thing of beauty, something to be proud of when guests come over. Something where you would discard the interior parts before the case itself.   

       I can picture a whole setup with the mahogany case, printer, monitor, speakers, and scanner; complimented with a similar-finished keyboard with 26 different minerals on the keys and a full-sized solid marble trackball resting on a wooden base with jade buttons and a scroll wheel.   

       The case should be made to be reused, the keyboard, trackball, and speakers should be made to last, and the internal monitor module should be replacable.   

       A computer is an expensive investment, and should be built and shown with pride.
BinaryCookies, Aug 30 2002

       I'd like to see keys made from various (animal) body part bits set in clear plastic or laquer, each starting with the letter of the key.   

greep, Aug 31 2002

       //a styleless bakelite monstrosity// ??????
Marble makes me think of gravestones, urns and grimly ostentatious Victorian public buildings but I love bakelite, if Dell had offered my laptop in a bakelite casing I would have happily paid a premium for it. Croissant for the general idea though.
IvanIdea, Aug 31 2002

       Very nice, computers could do with being prettied up.   

       I actually have a beautiful blue marble tile that I sometimes use as a mousepad. It makes my hand cold after awhile though.
madradish, Sep 01 2002

       At last! I have broken the 2.5 croissant mark on one of my ideas. Wooohoo! Thank you every one...I'd invite y'all for a brewski but you know...kind of geographically impractical.   

       While I'm annoing (but hopefully not annoying!), how's about a computer built into a cabinet. All in hard wood, flatscreen rises from slot in the back of the desk, keyboard flips over in front of you. Varnished wooden trackball (like the id balls in Minority Report) is set in a brass ring on desk. All this at touch of button, like one of this casinos that hides itself when some one pulls on a coat hook.
Zircon, Sep 02 2002

       Mwah ha ha ha...The lord giveth and he taketh away!   

       Only kidding. I'll put the pastry back.
Jinbish, Sep 02 2002

       [UB] Actually I rather regret putting Cummingtonite in the idea description now. A few seem to have assumed it was the reason for the idea, but it wasn't, maybe I should change it to chrysotile, calcite, corundum or celestine.RE current academic status (you're a little off, but if thats how I come over then what the hell); I've just graduated from a four-year M.Geol (applied geology) Course. I do own a copy of the trusty DHZ, but find the internet is a good resourse for really obscure minerals that I always seem to encounter when undertaking projects eg Urano Thorainite, Schniederhoenite. In January I begin a Phd. which in July will be taking me to Mongolia (specifically the Gobi Desert) for ten weeks. Having said all this I don't for a minute claim to be particularly mature in terms of things I find laughsome.
Zircon, Sep 03 2002

       The inclusion of different rocks for different keys works to a point, assuming you are actually a geologist and can distinguish Vesuvianite from Baltimorite. What do you do for the other 75 keys on the keyboard? I like the idea for its aesthetics rather more than being a geology quiz.
PeterSilly, Sep 03 2002

       Just for that little frisson of danger, can't we have Serpentinite for the 'S' key?
(Nice to see [lewisgirl] lured out of retirement - presumably the temptation to tell her pathetic geologist's joke was too much)
hippo, Sep 03 2002

       [hippo] Don't start about bloody serpentinite.   

       [UB] It bothered me too. Hmmm. The first answer I thought of for this one was to set all the other keys in the same material that you make the 'base' of the key board with.   

       Then I thought YOU might be able to come up with subtle and extremely tortuous reasons why a given mineral should be associated with a given key, you seem fairly good at that sort thing. E.g. Realgar (Arsenic Sulphide) for the <end> key as it is poisonous. And, yes, mutton is a particular fave of mine. *sigh* Maybe if I get drunk enough on the spirits they make from the milk then I'll not notice the flavour (or lack of it)
Zircon, Sep 03 2002

       I guess the F1 key could also be made out of Fluorine, but I just run out of ideas for the others. Could be interesting. "Ma, my 1 key has just dissolved again".
PeterSilly, Sep 03 2002

       If we run out of oil like everyone says we will in the future (yeah right), then there will go the plastics business. So maybe we would need to build PC cases out of wood... ...or maybe not   

       Pain au chocolate for the idea though. (croissants are so plain)
AJCrowley, Apr 28 2003

       Now thats thinking!
simonj, Jul 17 2003

       I like this one only because Dr. Curry tends to drop keyboards on his feet! but in all fairness now matter how much i might like this I will not vote for it because that would be unhalfbakery like!
nomadic_wonderer, Feb 01 2004

       //I like this one only because Dr. Curry tends to drop keyboards on his feet!//
Jinbish, Feb 02 2004

       I have a bluetooth keyboard that I can move around the living room and use it more like a television remote control. Would I get a free fork-lift truck with the marble one?
grippit, Feb 02 2004

       splendid. +
jonthegeologist, Feb 02 2004

       Could also be used to bludgeon intruders ... aww, bun for you, sir! - [+]
Letsbuildafort, Feb 02 2004

       Couldn't agree more [AJCrowley]
PainOCommonSense, Mar 30 2004

       I think you would want all of the keys to be the same stone otherwise they would feel different and be difficult to work.
bspollard, Oct 05 2004

       They may work differently, but you'll feel really really rich.   

       Why not simply go white marble frame, black marble keys, and gold inlays for the letters? That seems expensive enough.
shapu, Oct 05 2004

       I'll have my personal keyboard in chrome. Because I like chrome. Period. <gasp> here goes another one of my precious buns away to you... by the way, i think there's a metal called zircon. if there isn't, somebody should name a new metal zircon. Because it's zircon's (the HBaker) idea, I might have my keyboard in zircon (the metal.)
croissantz, Oct 06 2004

       I can get a wooden one made in India if enough people want them.   

       Computer cases also.
subflower, Aug 05 2005


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