Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Mime Sweeper II

A real invisible box that eliminates that annoying mime
 
(+7, -7)
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Is there an annoying mime working a street near you? Just use the Mime Sweeper to rid the neighborhood of this annoying pest.

Here’s how it works. You slip up behind the mime and when no one is paying attention to him, most anytime usually, you slip the Mime Sweeper over his body. The Mime Sweeper II is a 6 x 6 x 6 clear plastic box that is completely undetectable, soundproof and airtight. Once over his body the Mime is trapped and cannot get out. The mime will give the performance of this life until he runs out of air.

theGem, Oct 23 2008

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       silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence silence .... hack, cough, ugh Okay, but mimes are at least quiet. Can you come up with a One-Man-Band Banisher?
MauiChuck, Oct 24 2008
  

       You're a sick, pinko, bleeding-heart liberal, [UB]...........
8th of 7, Oct 25 2008
  

       [UB] Is this comment meant to be serious because if it is it isn't. If it's meant tongue-in-cheek, then it really isn't funny. It seems to fall into the vague no-mans land of why did you bother.
theGem, Oct 25 2008
  

       // kill all the lawyers, then the gnomes, then the mimes /   

       Tautology. Gnomes aren't alive per se, which slightly mars the vastt enjoyment to be gained from smashing in their pointly little skulls with a hammer.   

       Suggest you substitute "destroy" or "eliminate" for "kill".   

       Also, mimes are worse and more annoying than gnomes, so they should come second on your list.
8th of 7, Oct 25 2008
  

       [UB] what we have here is not tongue-in-cheek, it’s black humor and [UB] you are missing the subtle irony in it. The mime is stuck in the box and is going through the same motions that he has tried to perfect as part of his act. The question is can he do it well enough for someone to believe it and help him. Then there are the people passing, do they ignore the mime because he is going through the same motions he usually does or do they think he is such a great mime that they leave a few coins and move on. And the last gruesome alternative, do they realize that he’s not miming and take videos with their cameras and upload a clip called “Mime gets It” to uTube.   

       Now if you called me out on stereotypism I would have to agree with.
theGem, Oct 25 2008
  

       <Watches amazed the uncommon spectacle of [UB] being lectured on "black humour">
8th of 7, Oct 25 2008
  

       Soundproof boxes are not the new custard, so it seems. Hey, UB, that's a timeless rant, no? Bravo. How would one translate it to other kneejerk reactions? Like, say, one's distaste for tilapia. I hate tilapia, but don't know how to voice this opinion.
Thanks for the help,
Disgusted in Dystopia
  

       A potential tip, [Gem]. When you attempt to explain the workings of your subtle humor, it's not so subtle, or humorous, anymore.
daseva, Oct 25 2008
  

       // A potential tip, [Gem]. When you attempt to explain the workings of your subtle humor, it's not so subtle, or humorous //   

       humorous /sic/   

       is that a bone?   

       those annoying mimes are just trying to earn a living.
po, Oct 25 2008
  

       Well, they coud do it some more socially acceptable way, like prostitution, selling arms, drug dealing, or people trafficking.   

       If they are really desperate, they could always go into politics..... but obviously they'd need to change their names - the shame for their families would be too great.   

       Or they could go to law school, but that's just silly. ......
8th of 7, Oct 25 2008
  

       Won't anybody think of the mimes ?
FlyingToaster, Oct 26 2008
  

       Well [UB] it appears we have come to an impasse so why don't we just "Agree to Disagree" and direct our attention on a group more worthy of our wrath then mimes like the morons that come up with platitudes like “Agree to Disagree.”   

       Enjoyed the spar.
theGem, Oct 26 2008
  

       Yes, why not. But we miss the good old days of the Troll hunts. Don't see so may of 'em around these days, think they may have been over-hunted in these parts .....   

       <gazes wistfully at well-polished and sharpened Troll Harpoon on hooks over mantlepiece>
8th of 7, Oct 26 2008
  

       The antidote to mimes is the ventriloquist. Give voice to a mime, and he's no longer a mime.
ldischler, Oct 27 2008
  

       "The antidote to mimes is the ventriloquist" - ldischler   

       [marked-for-tagline]
FlyingToaster, Oct 27 2008
  

       Now THERE'S an idea ...
8th of 7, Oct 27 2008
  

       So what we have here is a ventriloquist with a mime sitting on his knee and the audience has to figure out which one is the dummy.   

       [Tag-for-game-show]
theGem, Oct 27 2008
  


 

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