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"It would work, if you can find alternatives to each of the steps involved in this process."
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Attach this plunger, shaft with suction cup, onto the left mouse button of your mouse. Now you can hold the mouse like a pen with an absurdly large writing tip. That's right, instead of ending in a point, the writing instrument ends in something the size of a small boob.
||Addmittedly better than the title promised.
||I had the picture of Minny's and Mickey's life blood being slowly squeezed out through a pen nib.