Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Paraffin dog treats

For enhanced flammability!
(+2, -2)
  [vote for,

Ah, the flaming bag of dog poop. No doubt this approaches the Platonic form of the perfect prank. But one problem: the poop itself will not catch fire unless extremely dry - which would defeat the whole point of the prank.

Enter BUNGCO'S new Paraffin Dog Treat. These waxy boones are impregnated with ham and other things dogs find delectable. The paraffin and other waxes are gnawed away and eventually find their way to the stool. The result: a candle like poop, capable of catching fire and sustaining flame.

Fill the paper bag with these moist prizes, light the bag, ring the doorbell and cackle with glee!

bungston, Apr 23 2004

Okay so it's not exactly a TREAT http://www.petalia....y=150&Group_No=2135
[bristolz, Jan 11 2005]

Certainly you can find something more useful to do with the results of this http://www.halfbake...er/paraffin_20power
[Worldgineer, Jan 11 2005]


       I think paraffin wax would have all sorts of side effects on your dog's metabolism (diarrhea, perhaps) that would still ultimately thwart you.
DrCurry, Apr 23 2004

       yeah, you'd have to swap the bag for a bottle; Molodog cocktail!
stilgar, Aug 16 2004

       This idea is so bizarre I have to give it a croissant. Keep up the good work!
PinkDrink, Aug 16 2004

       Your dog would likely have to have a 'No Smoking' sign attached to it to avert catastrophe.
pooduck, Jan 10 2005

       Against my better judgement, I must vote for this idea. [although I'm going to search and see if Daniel is related to the {waxy boones}]
normzone, Jan 10 2005

       Some cat treats or foods have paraffin in them to control hairballs.
bristolz, Jan 11 2005

       Any knowledge on resulting flammability?
bungston, Jan 11 2005

       Hair is quite flammable.
Worldgineer, Jan 11 2005

       I thought the point of this prank would be that the victim would come outside, and on seeing the burning bag would quickly stamp on it to put it out, spreading the contents around their feet and doorstep. Although the burning poo may well act like napalm, adding to the fun.
fridge duck, Jan 12 2005

       What about Olestra?
nineteenthly, Mar 05 2006

       This is fun to read because 'paraffin' is used in 3 different ways in the idea and annotations:   

       1) Paraffin wax - what [bungston] means? Main component of cheap candles, solid at room temperature, won't burn without a wick unless you get it really hot.   

       2) Medicinal liquid paraffin - low toxicity, used to releave constipation, what [bristolz] refers to. Low flammability.   

       3) What some countries call kerosine, aka lighting paraffin, hydrocarbon fraction heavier than gasoline/petrol, burns easily if heated somewhat or soaked into a rag etc, the one that might need a 'no smoking' sign.
spidermother, Mar 05 2006


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