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Pay-As-You-Go Birth Control Pill

Having sex only now and then? Never fear...the Pay-As-You-Go Pill is here.
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To all my ladies: Relationships...ARG. More often than we'd like to admit, the men we get involved with can end up exhibiting some disappointing characteristics - but usally after its "too late". You've already sealed the deal, done the do...you know - straight up fucked. This is not to say that all men just cum and go - there are some really wonderful guys out there, and when you find him HOLD ON TIGHT.

But this half-baked idea I have is to help us in those weaker moments, when we just need a little lovin. It goes a little sumpin like this - why pay $32/month for birth control when we're not in a committed relationship? We need the coverage - afterall the pill is 99.9% effective, and doesn't accidentally break, or cause irritation.

I propose that a Pill be developed that would be paid for on a strictly as-needed basis. This would require 2 key aparatuses. (1) an CPU of sorts that is implanted into the necessary spot of the female anatomy, activated by (2) an external deposit box that accepts one dollar bills, obviously wireless, portable, and small enough to fit in your purse. When the deposit box recognizes money is being inserted signals are transmitted from the box to the implant, thus causing "pill activation". You're good to go. Get naked.

This way, ladies, you can take contributions from your men for this very reliable method of birth control. Afterall, both parties reap the benefits.

lizzaurenpizzagni, Mar 06 2003


       Overlooking all the other obvious problems with this idea for a moment (and there are many), one wonders how many thousands of dollars it will cost to purchase this coin-op implant and have it "implanted into the necessary spot of the female anatomy".
waugsqueke, Mar 06 2003

       "Pay-as-you-go Girth control" sort of describes my gym membership.
half, Mar 06 2003

       Move to a country where the Pill (and other birth control, um, mechanisms) are available free to all. Must cost less than the expenses waugsqueke mentions.
my face your, Mar 06 2003

       You are forgetting that BCPs require at least two weeks (some recommend a full cycle of 28 days) usage prior to intercourse or they will not be effective.   

       Periodic use will also produce havoc within your hormones.   

       Big huge fishbone. Try only dating men that have taken their elves to the vet and had them *fixed*. After all, why should the responsibility be the woman's?
OpheliaFrump, Mar 06 2003

       I'm also more than a bit concerned about the instead-of-condom connotation ("or cause irritation"). In our modern world you may end up dead.
Worldgineer, Mar 06 2003

       Well, it was a just a thought. Geez. Its a good thing I have a boyfriend...so there.
lizzaurenpizzagni, Mar 06 2003

       I'll say.
snarfyguy, Mar 06 2003

       How do you get the money out?
andrewm, Mar 06 2003

       Howsabout a coin-operated chastity belt?
Cedar Park, Mar 06 2003

       i don't know if anyone else knows this, but when you use the morning-after pill you go through flu-like symptoms, and it is only around 75% effective.
Ukato, Mar 07 2003

       Would an implanted pill dispenser be any more comfortable than an IUD?
ye_river_xiv, Jul 11 2006


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