Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Philae 2061: Sploshdown

It would take a miracle, but it might just... okay, it won't work.
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Let me start by saying that I salute traditional Birdman events, in which incurably hopeful people throw themselves off the end of seaside piers while strapped to the world's least aerodynamic contraptions. However, I can't help feeling they're a bit yester-century.

Let's up the ante by moving from catastrophic amateur flight to calamitous amateur space exploration, with the inaugural 'Spolshdown'.

What's sploshdown? It's a gathering of like-minded astrothusiasts finding ingenious ways (trebuchet, elastic under tension, brute strength and will power etc) of launching washing-machine-sized satellites (or Philae- sized washing machines) towards the passing Halley's Comet, in the hope that a timely gust of wind or an unusual disturbance in the time space continuum will help it on its way.

First person to land their washing machine on the comet wins a crate of pokey West Country Ale, and a sponsored T-shirt. We've got until 2061 to plan this, people. Let's make it happen.

Fishrat, Dec 09 2014

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       <Frantically scrabbles through old Acme catalogue>   

       [+]
8th of 7, Dec 09 2014
  

       A google review says West Country Ales is gone four months ago, replaced by a sweets shop.
normzone, Dec 09 2014
  

       I'm thinking some tinkering and recoding of the Kerbal Space Program should get us close-ish.
RayfordSteele, Dec 09 2014
  

       Those socks are how life began.
4and20, Dec 09 2014
  

       I think the event should be annual, starting this summer. You know, in case the comet arrives early or something.
pocmloc, Dec 09 2014
  

       <summons mental image of Earth under relentless random bombardment by superannuated white goods>   

       <quiet chuckles>   

       Yes, [poc], that's a truly excellent suggestion.
8th of 7, Dec 09 2014
  
      
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