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Plasticine Surgery

Why put your precious body image in the hands of a plastic surgeon?
 
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Plastic surgery can go wrong. And, let's face it, when you're under the knife you're (hopefully) asleep, and at the mercy of someone whose sense of aesthetics you don't even know, let alone agree with.

So, instead of sillicone implants, why not have a subcutaneous plasticine implant instead? Not only is it sculptable beneath the skin, but you can also work it into the places where it is needed. With a half hour or so of clever massaging you can turn that plasticine boob job into a Jennifer-Lopez-style ridiculously pert bum: if you're particularly massage masterful you could even divert some of that material up to your face and get those cheekbones you've always wanted. Adaptable for any occasion.

And if you're a guy? Well, as long as no-one wants to feel your squishy faux-muscles, you can look fantastic. You could get yourself a six-pack with less effort than it would take to actually walk down to your local off-licence.

dustmonkey, May 14 2003

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       Women would look a bit flat in the morning if they sleep on their chest, but I'm sure their SO's would love the task of putting them back into shape.   

       What am I talking about. Our world is way too image-centric. I won't bun anything related to plastic surgery.   

       (later) Others have convinced me that there are many benefits besides looks to this idea. Kind of want one myself. +
Worldgineer, May 14 2003
  

       I thought you were talking about using plasticine to rehearse an operation. When I was trying to memorise transverse sections of the brain stem, I build a model of the thing with all the structures modelled in different colors. When my fellow students were doing their last minute cramming outside the exam hall, I whipped out my model and showed them what it looked like when I sliced through the model at certain places. Their eyes bulged as it dawned on them. It was the first time they understood the sections they had memorised.   

       Having read your idea; I'm gonna hurl (-)
FloridaManatee, May 14 2003
  

       never be bored again. I have just manipulated my left into a stegasaurus and the right into the Eiffel tower. +1
po, May 15 2003
  

       What about newsprint?
thumbwax, May 15 2003
  

       Boy gets girl:   

       "I <squish> just <squish> love <squish> to <squish>squish <squish> your <squish> breasts <squish> <squish, squish, squish, squish, squish...>   

         

       Left Breast: <squish, squish> "HELLOOooo Pokey!"
Right Breast: <squish, squish> "Gumby! Gumby!" <squish, squish, squish>
Tiger Lily, May 15 2003
  

       This one's called Wallace, and this one's called Grommet.
egbert, May 15 2003
  

       This is the first 'bakery idea that has actually made me shudder. I'm picturing the "Under The Skin Crawling Horribles" from Cronenberg's Shivers. Ugh.
my face your, May 15 2003
  

       Doesn't plasticine go crunchy after a while?   

       Play Doh always used to.
MikeOliver, May 15 2003
  

       In some interview or other, I recall Baz Luhrmann explaining how Nicole Kidman got her impressive décolletage in "Moulin Rouge" - they started with her feet, and squeezed up the legs, thighs, and waist, until it was all 'up there'. Perhaps she was already plasticinised.
friendlyfire, May 15 2003
  

       Wow. I'd have paid to have had that job.
dustmonkey, May 15 2003
  

       bruising. pain. boob on shoulder. foreign objects imbedded. no. no. no.-
k_sra, May 15 2003
  

       Bummer! [thumb] stole my response.
Shz, May 15 2003
  

       MikeOliver: plasticine doesn't dry out, which is the whole point.
DrCurry, May 15 2003
  

       scrunched-up newspaper implants were never going to work, Shz.   

       "My left breast is yesterday's Guardian, and the right is Wednesday's Sun"   

       "and my arse implants were what my chips were wrapped in on Friday night..."
dustmonkey, May 15 2003
  

       <sound of dustmonkey sitting down>Crunch</sodsd>
Worldgineer, May 15 2003
  

       What if it all sagged down to your feet? New shoes?
DesertFox, Apr 30 2004
  

       Ever wake up with the impression of whatever you were sleeping on pressed into your skin? You haven't seen *anything* yet...
eodell, Sep 03 2004
  

       I seem to remember most of my plasticine creations looking shit.
choaderboy, Sep 03 2004
  


 

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