Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Pre-pierced film lids

 No more hunting for sharp impliments
 
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In this day and age, it's hard to believe that we have to suffer the humiliation of 'preparing' a frozen ready-meal for one.

The target market for frozen ready-meals want mealtimes to be over quickly, so as not to remind them of their lonely, evanescent existence.

But still frozen meals come with instructions to 'pierce film lid several times' before microwaving. Perhaps this is because the government are hoping to thin-out the unpopular generation. Perhaps the idea is that loners, prompted by the stabbing motion of piercing the film lid, will grow frustrated and do themselves in.

So, come on. Show the world that you care by preparing frozen ready-meals with pre-pierced film lids. The food's frozen, it won't slop out.

—kpx, Dec 24 2002

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       Having pre-pierced film would make it a lot easier to tamper with food un-noticably. Also these holes would be a great entry point for bacteria and knowing how poorly supermarkets look after food I'm not sure I'd want to by these.
—oneoffdave, Dec 24 2002
   

       <pedant> implements </pedant>   

       Sorry.   

       (eagerly awaiting Sorta Claus)
—madradish, Dec 24 2002
   

       So, provide another layer of wrapping over that pre-pierced lid.
—neelandan, Dec 24 2002
   

       Build pressure relief flaps in to the film. That's what the holes are for anyway. They could be glued with a food grade, temperature sensitive adhesive so they wouldn't release until they are warmed up.
—half, Dec 24 2002
   

       Can I just have a lifetimes supply of nutrients drip fed from a cholostomy-style bag? Then I wouldn't have to bother with any of that tedious chewing, swallowing and digesting either.   

       But seriously, folks...back in the days when I was single, I built up a repertoir of deliciously tasty meals prepared from fresh ingredients, none of which took more than twenty minutes to prepare from opening the fridge to serving. There's really no excuse if you just put a little thought into it.
—egbert, Dec 24 2002
   

       whats required (you may disagree - its OK its xmas) is some sort of cellophane zip(per)
—po, Dec 24 2002
   

       Have frozen pointy ingredients poking up -- asparagus, etc. -- then just press the film to pierce it.   

       //some sort of cellophane zip(per)//
[po], by an interesting coincidence, there's a club downtown called "Cellophane Zipper". Maybe they have a spare.
—Amos Kito, Dec 24 2002
   

       how about a fork, wrapped in film of course, given free with each meal so you could pierce the meal film. Of course you will need a fork or knife to pierce the fork film..., so why not a knife, wrapped in film of course, given free...
—bushman, Dec 24 2002
   

       Build in low heat sharp tipped pop-up timers. They pierce from the inside when you begin heating. Um... Might be less effort to pierce with a fork than to remove the timers.
—Shz, Dec 24 2002
   
      
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