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Race with a Twist

Can the track announcer do it?
  (+20, -2)(+20, -2)
(+20, -2)
  [vote for,

The track announcer's attempt to correctly call this race would only increase the entertainment value. Side bets could be made on if/when/where the announcer would lose it.

Imagine... "They're under starter's orders...and they're off.. Toy Boat is cleanly out of the gate followed by Sixth Sick Sheikh and She Sells Seashells. It's Pheasant Plucker and Schwab's Schnaaps Shop, and Peggy Babcock on the inside. Seething Sea Sufficeth and Three Free Throws, followed by Enemy Anemone, Truly Rural, Irish Wristwatch, Soldiers' Shoulders and Tragedy Strategy bringing up the rear. ... "And into the home stretch it's Soldiers' Shoulders, out of nowhere, neck and neck with Toy Boat and Sixth Sick Sheikh, then Schwab's Schnaaps Shop, Enemy Anemone and Truly Rural. It's Soldiers' Shoulders and Toy Boat; It's Toy Boat and Soldiers' Shoulders with Schwab's Schnaaps Shop six lengths back. And making a move here comes Sixth Sick Shiekh! It's Sixth Sick Sheikh, it's Soldier's Shoulders.. Soldiers' Shoulders and Sixth Sick Shiekh! And at the wire it's Soldiers' Shoulders by a neck and Sixth Sick Sheikh, and Toy Boat in third, with Enemy Anemone and Truly Rural and Schwab's Schnaaps Shop in sixth..."

Gamma48, May 21 2007

Derek & Clive - horse racing http://www.phespiri...e/ad_nauseam_02.htm
Transcript [Ling, May 24 2007]


       It's against all the 'rules'. Well swum, swan. +
Ling, May 21 2007

       Toy boat? Tommy's toy tanker, shirley.
marklar, May 21 2007

       I couldn't do it, but partially because I broke down in (nearly tears of) laughter.   

       [+], of course.
Germanicus, May 21 2007

       "here comes red leather followed closely by yellow leather, its red leather yellow leather, red leather yellow leather closing in on the finish line!!"   

bleh, May 21 2007

       "And Picked Peck of Pickled Pepper being ridden superbly here by young Peter Piper..."
Mr Phase, May 21 2007

       [marked-for-deletion] list.
nuclear hobo, May 21 2007

       "list - the invention itself is a conversation game that is played in the annotations."   

       This invention isn't 'a conversation game that is played in the annotations'. It's an invention of a new type of racing meet, one where the tongue-twistical qualities of the horses'/cars'/crabs' names provides extra entertainment and betting opportunities.   

       Admittedly most of the annos have been list-y, but I don't think this should be [mfd]ed.
imaginality, May 21 2007

       Baked to a crisp by any number of comedians starting at least as far back as the Marx Brothers.
nuclear hobo, May 22 2007

       I also disagree with the MFD and chuckled out loud. (+)   

       Jockeyularitly horselarious.   

       Many ideas have seen annos make jokes carrying on from the idea, but they are not lists. Look at supermarket priates, many jokes about the idea, but not a list.
Germanicus, May 22 2007

       Call for a list? Nah, although it's tongue tangled ferocity would make me wonder what would happen if one of those fell at the final furlong.
skinflaps, May 22 2007

       //we need horses called 'By a neck', 'furlong' and 'photograph finish'//   

       Similarly [bigsleep], I've always thought the best name for a racing greyhound would be "Vacant Trap".
theleopard, May 22 2007

       One smart fellow he felt smart Two smart fellows they both felt smart Three smart fellows they all felt smart.   

       Say that 3 times fast.
twitch, May 23 2007

       John Lennon's lemon linen jacket.
MaxwellBuchanan, May 23 2007

       But it's such a great list!
elhigh, May 23 2007

       Scouse japesters and footballing legends Robbie Fowler and Steve McMananamanamanan own or owned a couple of racehorses, the horses being called "Some Horse" and "Another Horse" for the purposes of making the commentators sound like silly billies.
calum, May 24 2007

       Robbie Fowler is only a legend on Merseyside, son. The rest of us think he's a bell-end.   

       May I refer you to Peter Cook and Dudley Moore's "Race" skit. OK, it's scatological and sleazy, but it made me laugh.
neuro, May 24 2007

       [admin: I'm ignoring the mfd tag for the reasons given by imaginality. Please don't use marked-for-deletion markers unless you mean them. Thanks!]
jutta, Jun 07 2007


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