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Royal Bail Out

Make the US appear even greater
  (+9, -5)
(+9, -5)
  [vote for,

News that the Queen could be broke within 3 years has reached the ears of the US.

How can this be? How could we let this happen? How can they?

Well we bailed out Wall Street, Banks, and the Auto industry.

I say let's bail out The Queen.

On street corners everywhere. Akin to Salvation Army bells at Christmas. But with the bell ringers dressed like royal bell ringers and trumpet blowers.

God, and/or the US, Save The Queen.

blissmiss, Jun 30 2009

War of 1812 http://en.wikipedia...rning_of_Washington
You feel lucky ? [8th of 7, Jun 30 2009]

Panini Sticker Album of the (soccer) World Cup 2006 http://www.youtube....watch?v=iNr1Ul1LoJY
Much like the trade in Royals... (?) [Jinbish, Jul 02 2009]

The Royal Warrant http://en.wikipedia.../wiki/Royal_Warrant
[calum, Jul 02 2009]


       A fish-n-chips fundraiser?
Win a date with Harry?
Surely there's a spare castle they can rent...

       The exchange rate is poor right now, so you'll have to work 50% harder...
phoenix, Jun 30 2009

       London has been discussing this, well LBC has. it's been agreed that to save money, they could all get proper jobs (apart from the Queen obviously): Charlie could act as chauffeur and Andrew as pilot on the official cars/planes.   

       btw I think its a great idea that the US should bail out the royal family (rather than us as usual)
po, Jun 30 2009

       eh po? What's that? Touché my friend.
blissmiss, Jun 30 2009

       //I think its a great idea that the US should bail out the royal family //
Bail 'em out? They can 'ave the lot, wholesale.
AbsintheWithoutLeave, Jun 30 2009

       We'll drive off that bridge when we come to it.
normzone, Jun 30 2009

       ... dang.
FlyingToaster, Jun 30 2009

       Ohhhh the hostility is killing me. I thought we were one big happy world now, sort of.
blissmiss, Jun 30 2009

       // I thought we were one big happy world now, sort of. //   

       You need to lay off that stuff, really, you do. Whatever it is.   

       It may be cogent to point out that Queen Elizabeth II is also still Queen of Canada - the only country ever to sucessfully invade the United States and burn down the White House......
8th of 7, Jun 30 2009

       //You need to lay off that stuff, really, you do. Whatever it is. // To what are you referring to exactly?
blissmiss, Jun 30 2009

       //burn down the White House...//
twice actually; both justified retaliations for invasions from the South best described as "armed bar-hopping".
FlyingToaster, Jun 30 2009

       "...Queen Elixzabeth ii..."
So the poor lady has already traded in her capital I's for cheaper lower case i's (and a spare "x")?
phoenix, Jul 01 2009

       Sp. Fixed.
8th of 7, Jul 01 2009

       //Well we bailed out Wall Street, Banks, and the Auto industry//

Don't forget the $30billion of aid to Israel as well! Rather than a bail out, how about we just sell her to you?
DrBob, Jul 01 2009

       Pimp my Queen?
zen_tom, Jul 01 2009

       Dr.Bob, I for one would like to have a Queen here, I think. I have always been jealous of you Brits. I think that most here think that. Perhaps that was displayed when the young lads were here not long ago. Or am I just royally naive?
blissmiss, Jul 01 2009

       //how about we just sell her to you//
note to self: investigate business opportunities of "Royal Temp Agency" to fill in for governments overworked or on vacation.
FlyingToaster, Jul 01 2009

       It's a kind thought, [blissmiss], but really, she'll be fine. She can always fix truck engines as, I think, she learned to do for the army during World War II. Some of her younger relatives might have more trouble, but I expect it'll be a good character-building experience for them.
pertinax, Jul 01 2009

       //royal lottery//
might be an indication of my own political leanings, but I'd rather have 2nd prize... or I would if I watched Coronation Street that is.
FlyingToaster, Jul 01 2009

       //How can this be? How could we let this happen? How can they? //   

       Aye. Tis as I feert.
Behold the power of the Stone of Destiny!

       I meant this idea as an "oh great, another unasked for US intervention". I guess the situation, and this idea, are not funny, or socially informative, or worth the paper they're printed on....
blissmiss, Jul 01 2009

       [MFD] not worth the paper its printed on - hang on there's no paper.
po, Jul 01 2009

       The Queen should join Bernie Madoff in a cell. The Windsors have been running a Ponzi before Bernie knew what Ponce meant.   

       Bail out the Queen? Not unless she is exposed to a "senior liability tranche" of significant proportions that she sold back to the Fed.   

       Err, OK lets bail out the MA'AM....
4whom, Jul 01 2009

       "Dr.Bob, I for one would like to have a Queen here, I think."
Perez Hilton isn't enough?
phoenix, Jul 01 2009

       //Or am I just royally naive?//

Err...yes. ;o)
DrBob, Jul 01 2009

       I think a lot of people are operating under the misconception that "bailouts" are bad.   

       Bailouts are all you have!   

       Small things fold, and are swallowed up, or assimilated. Big things just get owned by someone else.   

       AIG had to be bailed, for two reasons. It owned large amounts of "senior tranche" debt, and the senior tranche debt that it owned was, by and large, commoditised and sold off. Sold off to people the US don't really like, but had the money in balance of payments. Heck, we (RSA) even have a bit of that action.   

       Reason two was the senior tranche it did still hold was going from bad to worse. This would be fine if it was other peoples' money, but it wasn't. They had sold off all the relatively good stuff and held the bad, beginner's error. Further, they had raised capital at the "reserve" for this crap. They had borrowed twice, in essence.   

       So it was a case of buy yourself back, or be owned by someone else (that you don't really trust) who owns you because of the crap you bought from them (balance of payments).   

       For this reason it would be a good idea to bail out the "queen of mud-island". She does after all have a nominal grip on the Federal Reserve, having put some dosh in there despite the tea throwing incedent.   

       She also bought a lot of the gold that the US dumped when they left the gold standard. Remember all those gold auctions of yesteryear? Anonymous bidders beating out the "oiled" elite?   

       So you need to bail her out just to retain your/her initial investment. It all becomes one investment after a while...Ask King Leopold II
4whom, Jul 01 2009

       //So it was a case of buy yourself back, or be owned by someone else (that you don't really trust)//

<Devil's Advocate> So why would, say, the Chinese government be any less trustworthy than an American government that sold out it's electorate and left large swathes of them without employment in order to satisfy the greed of a few bankers? </DA>

footnote: See what you've done now blissy!
DrBob, Jul 01 2009

       [DrBob] purely becaused they are perceived as the antagonist. As a population you (US) should *sell out* to the Chinese. Hey, we (as Africa) are doing it. And there are benefits, of course those benefits accrue mostly to people of chinese extraction.   

       To answer [rcarty]'s the fundamental questions of economics, Supply and Demand. You got supply and we have demand, we have business. We got supply you have demand, we have business. I have no supply, you have no demand, no business. Or any of the variations where either supply or demand are null. It really is very binary.   

       So keep Lizzy in the castle, bailing her out is not such a bad idea...
4whom, Jul 01 2009

       [Dr.Bob]. I'm dancing around the slithering worms and the empty can has rolled down the street.
blissmiss, Jul 01 2009

       I'm trying to picture Obama becoming the CEO of Royalty Inc. What Michelle could do for HM's mojo.
dentworth, Jul 02 2009

       [4whom] are you suggesting we should flog off Her Maj to the Chinese?   

       Would that make them Queen Erizabeth and Prince Phirrip?
coprocephalous, Jul 02 2009

       You"re going to hell for that...you know ;-)
blissmiss, Jul 02 2009

       The Queen as an individual and the Monarchy as an institution are economically valuable assets (though the Monarchy is more of an asset grouping, with write-downs likely necessary in respect of, say, Harry) so there is no reason why she and it couldn't be subject to my "Privatise Animals" scheme (qv.), similar I suppose to the Bowie Bonds thing which was such a riproaring success, you'll recall. Los Queeno, as she is called in this neck of the woods, and her attendant institution are much richer in assets of all types - corporeal (hats, Land Rovers, ravens), heritable (Balmoral, Windsor, Buck Hoose) and incorporeal (goodwill, her likeness) - than she is in cash. I can see no reason why she couldn't be marketed like Michael Owen, to whichever countries, companies or unincorporated entities as may be best able to ease her liquidity issues. Certainly there would have to be a fairly robust shareholders' agreement, to prevent gauche colonialists gaining total control and having the auld dear opening IHOPs and whatnot, what, but that's lawyerly detail. We're discussing the broad commercial principles here, yeah?
calum, Jul 02 2009

       //she couldn't be marketed like Michael Owen// - good point, why *isn't* there an international royalty transfer market?
hippo, Jul 02 2009

       //international royalty transfer market//   

       Like a Panini sticker album?
"Got, got, got, need, need, got, got..."
Jinbish, Jul 02 2009

       //international royalty transfer market// There used to be a very strong one, back in ye day. The Burgundians, Hapsburgs, Bourbons, Plantagenets, Capetians, Saxe-Coburgs, Grimaldis, Braganzas, Oldenburgs, Leszczyñskis, and the Schleswig-Holstein -Sonderburg-Glücksburgians all participated in a lively transfer market known colloquially as "The Middle Ages"
zen_tom, Jul 02 2009

       But in the case of the Middle Ages, the marriage transfer was simply the vehicle for the power and property of whatever royal line was being absorbed, in much the same way that when Company Q purchases Company F, it is not really the share capital of F that Q wants, but its assets, customers, brand. To that extent, and until the merch prospects for players (rather than their skill wiv da ball) becomes the standard and key underlying purchase for the football transfer, the Windsor/Nevilles comparison falls somewhat, what.   

       That said, the Panini album element was alive and well in the M.A., with flattering portraits of horse-faced fillies being passed around Courts Royal as a means of enticing young Princes to wed.
calum, Jul 02 2009

       Beat me to it [z_t] - I think Queen Victoria managed more than most to affect the transfers in the 19th century.
Hey, how about Royalty Top Trumps? Noses, haemophilia...
coprocephalous, Jul 02 2009

       "Collect the complete set ....."
8th of 7, Jul 02 2009

       //You're not answering the fundamental question of economics.//   

       I'm leaving it to the Romer's to know what they are doing. I mean, after all, I only have 4 college level classes at a respected US university in economics, so I probably am no expert. Christina Romer happens to have a PHD from MIT & taught at Princeton & Cal Berkeley, as did her husband.
Perhaps they might know more about Economics than I do, I dunno.
Zimmy, Jul 02 2009

       Perhaps she could negotiate some promotional sponsorship arrangements, possibly even a product or two. Nike Air Elizabeths may not be the way to go.
tatterdemalion, Jul 02 2009

       That already exists, as the Royal Warrant, for which the warrant holder must pay a fee.
calum, Jul 02 2009

       Yes, but go one step further. Let's have Her Majesty doing television ads for Lea & Perrins.
tatterdemalion, Jul 02 2009

       Maybe the Royal Family could get some corporate sponsorship, from someone appropriate ? Audi, BMW, Mercedes, BASF, IG Farben, VW ? Any big German company ......   

       .....like Krupp .....   

       (Don't Mention The Wars)
8th of 7, Jul 02 2009

       Although the Borg do have a Queen, she isn't the same as Elizabeth II. We aren't sure if Wills, Harry et. al. can be reasonably described as an "Agressive Hegemonising Swarm" (as [gnomethang] succinctly describes us) either.   

       Our use of the plural is similar; but we do not like horses, corgis, or wearing silly hats. Also, none of our ancestors are German.
8th of 7, Jul 02 2009


       "I'm dancing around the slithering worms and the empty can has rolled down the street"
normzone, Jul 02 2009


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