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Here in the northern hemisphere, autumn is in full bloom (?) and winter is creeping silently on little cat feet, soon to be nipping at your nose. You're feeling a bit of a chill, so you think about lighting a fire, but they can be so messy! Why not try the new Schrödinger's Fireplace? (patent pending)
Fireplace requires no special installation, permits, or hookups. It produces no smoke, no carbon monoxide, and no ashes. Simply place the patented asbestos-lined steel box in your living room and enjoy the cozy warmth provided by your understanding that while a cheery fire could be blazing away safely within the sealed box, there is an equal likelihood that no combustion is taking place at all!
Order your Schrödinger's Fireplace today! Operators could be standing by. Marshmallows might not be included. Not recommended around cats. Warranty void if steel box is opened.
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[8th of 7, Nov 06 2012]
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||Baked; all fireplaces increase entropy, especially when lit.
||Bun withheld pending restoration of the
||Schrödingerwviernpflatzgeheim yezt aber vas zu geiben
zi? Ein bön ist pronouncionnengeven as ein fisch oder
as zein schtrudl ?
||"Schrödïngër" häs bëën fïxëd.
||Yïkës! Höw dö Ï gët rïd öf thësë därn thïngs???
||// Höw dö Ï gët rïd öf thësë därn thïngs??? //
You want to be careful with that stuff, [pash].
Even during WW2,
the British developed a weaponised joke that
was "over 60,000
times as powerful as Britain's great pre-war
joke, as used at
||There are Strategic Humour Limitation
Treaties to protect future
generations against the horrors of
unrestricted joke warfare.
Unfortunately, Mitt Romney hasn't read any
||Or did you press the "W" key while holding
down the "Dubyah" option key