Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Quis custodiet the custard?

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Scorn Chips

grind potatoes, pour on scorn
 
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Extra fatty, greasy, salty, DELICIOUS potato chips (crisps to you foreign folk) with the most eye-catching, enticing packaging. On each chip is an insult or other statement of ridicule. The idea is to make people choose between rubbing their own noses in their failure or abstaining from the tastiest snack on Earth. If they give in, they are reminded with every bite of their weakness.... but the guilt feels SOOOOOO good!

"I'm gonna go straight to your thighs, fatty!"

"Bulking up for winter there, tubby?"

"Do I please thy senses? Well you offend mine!"

21 Quest, Apr 19 2010

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       But crisps are sliced, not ground. And who looks at their crisps anyway? Is this an American thing, to eat ground crisps while inspecting both sides of each one?
pocmloc, Apr 19 2010
  

       Surely it should say
  

       "...Well thou dost offend mine!"
  

       or perhaps
  

       "...Well thou offendest mine!"
DenholmRicshaw, Apr 19 2010
  

       Chips is actually an Americanism I kinda agree with as they should be made from chips of potato*. However, a lot of popular brands are made from mash, e.g. Pringles. It is this type of crushp that lends its elf to being printed with a message due to its manufacturing process.
  

       Also, I assume the summary was derived from the example, "Grind beans and pour water on them".
  

       *I dislike the name French fries though, so what should we call them? Extrusions**?
  

       **I don't really mean extrusion, but whatever you call the process of pushing something through a grid, like you do with an egg or apple. Not the manual way of making them using a knife.
marklar, Apr 19 2010
  

       Wonderful! "Eat me and DIE!!!"
superjohn, Apr 19 2010
  

       its a racket, I hear.
po, Apr 19 2010
  

       "I'd like a steak please."
"And how would you like your potatoes, sir?"
"Served please."
  

       Alternatively, racquet potatoes sounds quite nice too - like croquette. Plus of course, Americans can still spell it wrong.
marklar, Apr 19 2010
  

       sp. "wrongly"
8th of 7, Apr 19 2010
  

       For a better pun on the title of this idea, I'd make them *corn* chips—packaged exclusively with Insult Salsa, the salsa that says YOU'RE A FATASS in big capital letters all around the label, so that dipping is impossible without lowered self- esteem.
DrWorm, Apr 19 2010
  

       + Fantastic! So glad I popped in on this idea.
  

       Similarly: Try our chips and we promise you'll be back again and again to haul it through the checkout line, even though it says our brand 'Porkers!' on every bag! 'Porkers! You'll eat your heart out!'
Mustardface, Apr 19 2010
  

       //On each chip is an insult or other statement of ridicule
  

       How? Is each chip individually packaged?
simonj, Apr 22 2010
  

       Seared on the chip itself.
21 Quest, Apr 22 2010
  

       This would work well for Pringles.   

       Pringles and Baked Lays.
21 Quest, Apr 23 2010
  


 

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