Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Self-lighting bong

Because your relaxing
 
(+3, -3)
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Okay, I'm pretty new to the bakery. I have been on for awhile and haven't seem any ideas like this, realting to marijuania. I hope my idea isn't in poor taste. I actually request that I be deleted if so.....

A standard one man hookah. Basically a chamber with a bowl mounted at the top with a tube that extends below the waterline. The waterline in the bottom of the chamber. At the top of the chamber there is a brass connector that the plastic tubing connects to. The user inhales through the tubing. When inhaling there is a vacuum inside the chamber. This vacuum is dectected by a diaphram sensor. The vacum causes air to rush through the top of the bowl. When this happens the vacuum sensor triggers circuitry that ignites a flame above the bowl. This is accomplished by having a butane vessel that is controlled by a soldenold valve. The valve is connected to plumbing that conveys the butane to a jet above the bowl. There is a sparker circuit the constantly creates a spark (think tazzer circuit, lots of diodes and capacitors) Inside the chamber a laser diode shines through the empty space on above the water. When smoke is present the laser beam is retarded and detected by a Cds cell across the way from the laser. A Cds cell is a photoresistent sensor, when the voltage drops to a certain level the circuitry turns the flame off. Optionally there is an automatic carb. A ball plumbing valve, motorized and connected to the curcuitry. So the automation goes like this. The user starts to inhale. A vacuum is created that initates a flame, a flame that burns intill the laser system detects smoke. When the user stops inhaling the vacuum drops and the carb opens. The user can now enjoy the rest. Repeat. every day.

evilpenguin, Jul 04 2007

Self Lighting Pipe http://gizmodo.com/...mes-roll-273142.php
Yay, drugs. [zen_tom, Jul 04 2007]

[link]






       Somebody did this already, maybe not so well engineered. And obviously this hurts memory, not helps it, because you forget that you've been here quite a while already.
normzone, Jul 04 2007
  

       link?
evilpenguin, Jul 04 2007
  

       Lay-zee-bong.   

       Light your own bongs, grind your own coffee, cook your own food. That's just my approach.
wagster, Jul 04 2007
  

       Yawn.   

       sp. you're, realting, marijuania, dectected, diaphram, vacum, soldenold, vonveys, capacitrs, slines(?), retaurded, arcoss, photoresistent, plumbling, curcuitry, initates, intill.   

       //Repeat. every day// Are you sure that's a good idea?
zen_tom, Jul 04 2007
  

       Well, if nothing else you'll get more relaxed about your spelling...
wagster, Jul 04 2007
  

       //relaxed about your spelling...// Unfortunately not - far from acting like some combustible form of valium, weed turns me into a highly obsessive, unbelievably paranoid freak with razor-sharp powers of focus, only without any control over what gets focused on. Relaxation has nothing to do with it - unless you count muscle numbing fear. To be honest, I never could understand the whole relaxation thing (I used to think that people were making it up, and pretending to be all sleepy, just to play a trick on me - the conniving bastards) Needless to say, after the low-level mental illness climaxed into a full-blown series of psychotic episodes, I decided to steer reasonably clear of the old blow.
zen_tom, Jul 04 2007
  

       Well, at least when you run out of weed you could use this as a candle. The only accessories that would be needed are, a floppy elfy night cap, long robe and oversized floppy slippers.   

       You just know that I'm not taking the Mickey.
skinflaps, Jul 04 2007
  

       I was thinking of Wee Willy Winkie.
zen_tom, Jul 04 2007
  

       Well, at least I know you're not pulling the Winkie.
skinflaps, Jul 04 2007
  

       If my bong lit me on fire, I'd throw it away.
xandram, Jul 04 2007
  

       You're not alone there [z_t], it seems to do that to a surprising amount of people. Weed isn't quite as harmless as it's made out to be.
wagster, Jul 04 2007
  

       It's just that it has many varied effects on different people, just as prescription meds effect everyone differently. I almost died from a common blood pressure med I was given.
xandram, Jul 04 2007
  

       I'd be quite interested in a self-lighting bog.
wagster, Jul 04 2007
  

       Similarly, a self-fighting bong could provide a few evenings entertainment.
wagster, Jul 04 2007
  

       Or an elf-lighting bong...
wagster, Jul 04 2007
  

       //sp. realting, marijuania, dectected, diaphram, vacum, soldenold, vonveys, capacitrs, slines(?), retaurded, arcoss, photoresistent, plumbling, curcuitry, initates, intill.//   

       Bonged is as bonged does ...
nuclear hobo, Jul 04 2007
  

       hobo shutup. This idea came so fast spelling was too cumbersome. (just mad cuz im in denial)
evilpenguin, Jul 05 2007
  

       Dude just get a bic and light it yourself. your not going to get an equal burn using the method you have described. Also using a bic lets you control the burn for cornering, which is proper bong etiquette.
thekid420, Apr 28 2009
  
      
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