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Shopping Cart Turn Signals, Lanes in grocery aisles

Signals on shopping carts, Lanes in aisles would help prevent tragic accidents and aisle-angst in grocery stores everywhere.
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You've been there -- pissed off in the grocery because there's someone stopped in front of you, giving you no room to go around while they decide on exactly which brand of dill weed they really need? --or-- Entering a busy grocery store aisle "intersection," along with 10 other people who are just as frantic as you to get their dill weed and go home. Where do you go?

Ta-dah! This is where the grocery store lanes come in my friend. There would be a slow lane and a passing lane, which shoppers would utilize in making their shopping trip more efficient.

Along with "lanes", each cart would be equipped with turn signals, so that when entering busy intersections, no longer will you be bothered with the fake-smile back and forth moving of the cart while you're trying to figure out where the hell everyone else is headed.

The signal triggers would be on the cart handle, similar to brake handles on bikes. Along with these turn signals, there should also be a "straight" signal, so that you can make it clear that you are going straight into an intersection (and others realize that you hadn't just forgotten your turn signal). (Ah-hem, these should also be installed on cars.)

longdecember79, Feb 10 2004


       I'll bun this but I'm not sure it will work. What if your dill weed is on the bottom shelf in front of the fast lane? This being said, some traffic rules should be implemented. I think I'd be able to get around much faster if all isles were one way.
Worldgineer, Feb 10 2004

       Will there be traffic lights in the intersections, too? How about a police officer to help direct traffic? Ugh, and just imagine the ads and low-quality merchandise the markets will stuff near the intersections, for people who are waiting to merge in.
phundug, Feb 10 2004

       Because of carryover effects from driving, people here subconsciously usually move to the right side when passing in a crowded aisleway, so I just have to ask, do they do the opposite in the right-hand-drive countries?
RayfordSteele, Feb 10 2004

       No. People here are rude and just block the whole damn aisle.
swamilad, Feb 10 2004

       [rayford] Aside from the rude ones that swamilad mentions, the general concensus here is to keep left unless overtaking.
It just seems to happen without anyone realising, in shopping aisles, on staircases, in hallways, etc.
reap, Feb 10 2004

       The people who are irritating in the supermarket are probably the same ones who are rubbish at indicating when they're driving, so I'm not sure how much it would help. A loudspeaker attached to the trolley playing a siren might be more useful. Or employ someone to walk a couple of paces in front of you tolling a bell and shouting "make way". Or just hone your public speaking skills and shame them with enormous amounts of sarcasm. Just bust em out the way I say. I find it a great way to let off steam after a bad day in the lab.
hazel, Feb 11 2004

       Nicely written, and welcome to the HB "my friend", but the merest hint of a rant methinks. Shop on the internet, or go to a 24-hour supermarket at 3am.   

       As folk don't use the indicators on their cars, what makes you think they'll use them on shopping trolleys? Especially as everyone knows that shopping trolleys simply don't have a turning circle.
PeterSilly, Feb 11 2004

       ..unless you want to go straight.
squeak, Feb 11 2004

       or set up a shop called "Grocery Store for the undecided", where those with no trolley discipline can shop.   

       Next door will be "Grocery Store for those with clear Direction" (name needs some work). [longdecember79] and [hazel] can shop there instead without fear of trolley dallyers
jonthegeologist, Feb 11 2004

       Buy your own shopping trolley. Weld some big metal spikes and a cow-catcher on the front and wave goodbye to supermarket delays.

//go to a 24-hour supermarket at 3am//

I did that for the first time ever a few Fridays ago. After throwing out time at the pub, I decided to go shopping. It all felt very weird and somehow wrong. It reminded me a bit of the first episode of Blakes 7 where the mindless, drugged citizens are wandering around under bright lights with soothing music being played in the background. Never go shopping after a long session in the pub, that's my advice.
DrBob, Feb 11 2004

       I got a ticket for going 5 in a 2.
yabba do yabba dabba, Feb 11 2004

       Kinda like all my ideas, they'd work in a near-perfect world. Good thought, though, so {+}.
spacecadet, Feb 11 2004

       Never work, nor will the lanes. Any store that tries this will be the least-shopped in its business district. Folks will venture elsewhere rather than try to learn the shopping cart/lane driving rules.
waugsqueke, Feb 11 2004

       I want an asphalt median down the center, with a strip of grass and some rhododendron hedges.
dryman, Feb 12 2004

       I occasionally shop at a store with directional arrows on the floor (it's got great prices, a benefit of my job). About 20% of the people don't notice the arrows, and about 50% of the people get really angry with about 20% of the people.   

       Me, I never take a push cart. Always take the hand carry kind and get few enough items to go through the express lane. In and out in a flash.   

       Also, I have gone into 24 hours supermarkets really late. Sometimes you run into the restocker problem. Pallets of dog food in an aisle about as wide as 1.4 pallets of dog food. And oddly blocking the one thing on the aisle that I want.
swamilad, Feb 12 2004

       The worst was the midnight shift change. For some reason, none of the checkers could start ringing up anyone until ALL the other checkers got their drawers Z-d out, and this one register was broken, so we had to wait about 25 minutes to get out of there. I can't even remember what I was buying that was so blasted important that I waited around for that.
oxen crossing, Feb 12 2004

       I want a shopping cart with cattle prods sticking out all around for all the rug monsters that clog the aisles. When I do shopping, I am pushing/pulling 4 overfilled carts and those little shits...errr...sweet little darlings are a pain in the arse...errr...seem to impede my shopping progress. My 4 hour shopping trips could be cut by œ.
Klaatu, Feb 12 2004

       I work at a grocery store. I like these ideas, but I think the real problem would be getting people to use these features properly.Most drive sloppy on the roads because their in a hurry to save 5 seconds. They will most likely drive sloppy in stores. You usually have to look both ways before leaving a lane in a store. If you don't, it may not hurt to do so.
jefferyb304, Jun 11 2005

       In my city we have red-light cameras that photograph people who miss the yellow and go through on the beginning of the red. Tickets and photos of you are mailed to your home.   

       How about cameras in the store, and a judge watching all the cameras ? Rude or careless cart drivers find extra charges on their ticket at checkout...
normzone, Jun 11 2005


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