h a l f b a k e r y
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Impregnated toilet paper is not new. TP
impregnated with guarana, caffein, bitter
orange peel, green tea extract and Aloe
Vera, is. Using this TP results in small
regular doses as the substances in the
are absorbed through the skin. The skin
thinner and righly veined in the
where TP is regularly used.
Note that using this TP to clean the
bathroom mirror (for example) may
leave smudges instead.
The user may wish to get a second,
regular roll of TP, to use before sleeping
and on nightly outings to the bathroom.
This because of the stimulating effect of
the substances. The user may want to
some more TP in the morning, after a
rough night. I suggest coloring the
Slimming TP a distinctive color, such as
bright green, to discriminate from any
other, regular, TP the users has.
Note that leaving TP in contact with the
skin would not be a good idea. The level
of impregnation would be tuned to brief
contact and might give of too high a
dose. So don't let your kid play mummy
with this TP.
Be aware that some of the substances are
addictive. I see no problem, since a lot of
people go to the toilet several times a
||You skinny assholes make me sick.
||Altogether, rather a lot of caveats :-)
||Yours sincerely, a skinny asshole.
||No thanks, I don't want your skinny asshole.
||could I mummify myself in this wondrous stuff every night before sleep?
||A slim, slimming TP thong should do.
||Is righly veined a bad thing?