Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Status Beer

A reward for a long process
  (+11, -1)(+11, -1)
(+11, -1)
  [vote for,

While working all day installing software, populating databases, converting data, compiling code, or whatever it is that you do on a computer day to day, a good portion of your time and screen are taken up by sliding status bars.

A better idea would be a cold keg near the computer, with a tap on the desk beside your machine, and a chilled mug underneath, held on a small angle in it's cradle.

Flicking the switch on the back of the tap, the connection to the PC is made. When the next status bar slides across the screen, the tap opens and the beer flows from the tap,filling the glass at the same rate as the bar slides to completion.

When the last drop hits the perfect head, the PC bings, your task is done and your draft is ready. A reward for a job well done.

If it fails, you still have a partial beer to drink to tide you over until it gets working, then of course, you get another beer.

Giblet, Apr 06 2005

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       I'll add something witty after I finish typing this long Alcoholics Anonymous speech.
moPuddin, Apr 06 2005

       so the harder you work the more beer is ready for you at the end of the day according to how high your status bar has reached? or do you take a drink every time you complete a task? interesting.   

       status custard perhaps?
benfrost, Apr 06 2005

       Whenever you turn it on, the next status bar(s) will denote a beer.   

       User controlled.
Giblet, Apr 06 2005

       Weeelll...I'fe inshtalled Winderz Ekshpee on theshe ten overr here...and shome of those...errr.....over zhere somewhere... Coodyoo do zhe rest? I need a liddle resht for a while...
wagster, Apr 06 2005

       Replacing the "tea" in IT with beer.
david_scothern, Apr 06 2005

wagster, Apr 06 2005

       So, when Outlook says it has saved a draft, I shouldn't delete it?
AbsintheWithoutLeave, Apr 06 2005

       A saved draft is a flat draft. If it was canned beer the recycle bin would make sense, but a waste of the deposit.   

       [Wagster] if Apple made the iBeer, there would be controls to make sure you owned the beer before you could drink it.
Giblet, Apr 06 2005

       And if MicrobrewerySoft made it, periodically it would explode, then inform you that you'd made an error.
normzone, Apr 06 2005

       OK... I hate to have to ask this, but sometimes seeing an inside joke for a long time and not knowing it's origin is a tad annoying.   

       I did a search of Custard on HB and I think the power went out temporarily in the server's home city. The help didn't help me either.   

       My guess is it's filler. Is a custard idea all filler and no substance? Don't even get me started on tumbleweeds.
Giblet, Apr 06 2005

       If Apple made iBeer, it would taste just like any other beer but look so awesome that you'd happily pay double the price for it.   

       Custard? I think people just like using custard in ideas. It's cheap, versatile, comes in all forms from a watery liquid to a rubbery hard substance and has a certain comedic value. Seasoned 'bakers may know something I don't, but that's never been the case so far...
wagster, Apr 06 2005

       Sounds good, but if you're annoyed at the status bars, you probably want some instant gratification, not another "wait patiently for the reward". And the beer would get warm if it's sitting in the glass while taking an hour to fill. So, [-].   

       The "custard" referrence is to imply that you're using a "loved" material in a new way, but that it may not add any value. The idea may simply be loved because of the material involved. This quickly gets overused and unloved. Beer is not yet overused on the HB, but it will be soon if we reward ideas just because beer is involved.
sophocles, Apr 06 2005

       Thanks for the info.   

       The idea originally came from the idea of a physical status bar that raises and lowers so you could see progress from across the room.   

       The beer idea came after, partly because of the visual reference, and partly because it kind of sounds like bar.
Giblet, Apr 06 2005

       Sounds like your job sucks.
Laimak, Apr 07 2005

       That's my old job, I was using it as an example. I like my current job.   

       Installing windows in 30 story highrises. Repelling down the side of the building to do work.   

       And you should see what I do in construction ;)
Giblet, Apr 07 2005

       Trying to find the limit of beer as work performed approaches zero. Well, its zero, but that's beside the point. I want a beer, and I just used some brain power. So, hand it over.   

       Seriously, though, if beer flux is a function of brain power, and beer intake affects brain power, then there are all sorts of differentrial equations in this idea. I suspect, if you want max beer, then don't drink until the end of the day. If you want max getting-drunk-at-work-ness, then hook up the beer helmet and get to typing, DRONE!!!
daseva, Apr 07 2005

       [Unabubba] that's my running joke. Did IT all my life installing MS Windows, support, admin, etc.   

       During the dot-com-boom, i lost my job, and found myslef competing with far too many people for interviews. Quite a change from headhunters calling me monthly to get me to leave my then current job. And since most of thes people were paper MCSE's, I got frustrated with the Dilbert world.   

       I flipped collars from white to blue, and now I install sealed glass units (Windows) in residential highrises. The money is close but this keeps me in good physical shape, unlike the gargantuan ass I dragged around with from PC to PC.
Giblet, Apr 07 2005

       [giblet], I can *so* feel you on the whole dot-com washout thing. I didn't bother finishing my degree because the money was really good working full-time, and after the industry-wide IT drawdown I couldn't even get interviews because I didn't have those two critical letters:   

       B.S. (in whatever).   

       Now I'm moving into biotechnology *while* I get a degree... ;-)   

       As for the idea: no machine I've seen can pour "the perfect head".
justibone, Apr 07 2005

       I think this would greatly reduce productivity. Inebriation aside, once the status bar has finished, your beer is ready, and you'll surely want to drink it while it's fresh... and even if you do want to work a little more, you'll need a second glass to do so, otherwise you'll get beer on the floor, which is a clear cut case of alcohol abuse unless you say "this one's for the homies."   

       Perhaps a status beer bong would be better. As the status bar fills, your serving of alcohol empties into YOU. Thus the user has something to do while the computer plays with itself, both your installation and the computer's installation is done at the same time, and you'll both be raring and ready for another download. The computer can guzzle power, and the user can power guzzle, then when they're both done, it's back to serious interfacing.
ye_river_xiv, Jul 31 2006


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