Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Tabletop Pastamatron

  [vote for,

Somewhat inspired by the linked idea - the Tabletop Pastamatron.

Traditionally, pasta is extruded as a raw dough, then dried partially or wholly before being cooked and served. The Tabletop Pastamatron modifies this sequence of events. Each diner is presented with their own Pastamatron, with a series of different fitments to produce different types of pasta. They are also given a solid 4" cube of cooked pasta.

The cube of cooked pasta is placed in the hopper, the appropriate fitment is fitted, and the diner turns the handle, extruding the fully-cooked pasta of their choice directly onto their plate.

MaxwellBuchanan, Aug 20 2019

Somewhat suggested by: Pasta_20Channel
[MaxwellBuchanan, Aug 20 2019]


       The eating of a house made entirely from pasta.....including its contents of course.
xenzag, Aug 20 2019

       How would you get a 4" cube to cook evenly?
pertinax, Aug 21 2019

       Pasta needs to be cooked in quite salty water to make sure it is properly seasoned by the time it has finished cooking. If you cooked a 101.6mm cube (or a 4" cube, for historians), only the outer few mm would be tasty.
hippo, Aug 21 2019

       Not to worry - it can still feature on the Pasta Channel at a knock down price.
xenzag, Aug 21 2019

       "Buy this solid cube of poorly-seasoned undercooked pasta and get an ADDITIONAL cube of poorly-seasoned undercooked pasta ABSOLUTELY FREE!!!"
hippo, Aug 21 2019

       Ah, I neglected to mention the companion products, the Pastamalgamator. Simply cook any pasta to your liking, then place into the hopper. Activate the hydraulic ram, and within a few moments a solid block of perfectly cooked, perfectly salted pasta will be ready for use in the Pastamatron.
MaxwellBuchanan, Aug 21 2019

       This idea makes us inexplicably uncomfortable.
8th of 7, Aug 21 2019

       {Wonders how much modification would be required to an ordinary car-crusher to enable it to extrude [8th]'s cube as vermicelli}
pertinax, Aug 21 2019

       I prefer my pasta pairings to be extra-virgin, and so would have a pastamade (maid).
RayfordSteele, Aug 21 2019

       <Wonders how much modification would be required to an ordinary car-crusher to enable it to extrude [pertinax] as vermicelli>
8th of 7, Aug 21 2019

       Wait, don't you need vermin to make vermicelli? You know, like you need fuses for fusilli. I don't know why anyone would eat rigatoni.
Sgt Teacup, Aug 21 2019


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