Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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The Living Bed

For those that love nature but want the comfort of the great indoors.
  (+18, -1)(+18, -1)
(+18, -1)
  [vote for,

This is a bed with live vines growing from under the bed, up the four posts, and covering a trellis acting as a canopy.

I envision this bed made out of either drift wood or rough hewn wood. Artistically, I would like to carve wood sprites, fairies, and wood gnomes very lightly into the wood grain of the post, the foot and head board. Subtlety is the key there.

The canopy will be a wire trellis that has a seam down the middle, perpendicular to the way you would sleep on the bed with hinges to where they attach to the posts. This will allow the the bed to be taken apart without having to kill the plants growing on it, as they will fold down toward the foot or head of the bed so they can fit through doorways as needed.

The ivy( not poison) will be grown in two aeroponic tanks that include pumps at the head and foot under the bed with a nutrient water tank in the middle of them. The tanks are hidden under the bed and the water tank is removable, again allowing the bed to come apart for easy (well, mostly) moving.

Why aeroponics? The research shows that plants that are grown in such a system grow better, faster, stronger than those in soil. Something about more oxygen being available for the roots. You won't have soil to mess with- no creepy bugs, no changing when it gets impacted, and no heavy wet dirt to lug around.

You will need grow lights or skylights above the bed but the whole thing (pumps, lights) can be operated on a timer or a pressure switch under the mattress that keeps everything off while you are in it.Optional are white holiday lights to emulate the stars among the leaves.

So enjoy sleeping under stars flickering past the forest roof with creatures of the woods peeking through the leaves, right in your own bed, right in your own room.

NotTheSharpestSpoon, Mar 22 2006

Aeroponics http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aeroponics
For more info on what it is. [NotTheSharpestSpoon, Mar 22 2006]

Aeroponics http://www.cannabis.../articles/1378.html
For more info on how [NTSS] dreamt of this idea [methinksnot, Mar 22 2006]

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       I am particulary titilated by the prospect of swinging from vine to vine during lovemaking.
Texticle, Mar 22 2006

       I like! But questions: 1: Why is portability so important? 2: This sounds like it belongs outside. There will be more sun for the vines. You will have real stars. If you do not like bugs, bring mosquito netting.
bungston, Mar 22 2006

       How about grapevines instead of ivy?
methinksnot, Mar 22 2006

       /Why is portability so important? / Well, it's not that I'm on the lamb from anybody or anything like that. It's just that I figured that it could take a long time to get the plants just right and then if you redecorate and want to move the bed or just move (most people, in America anyway, tend to move every 5 years on average) then they don't have to die and you don't have to start over.   

       2) I really like a controlled climate, especially in a New England winter.
NotTheSharpestSpoon, Mar 22 2006

       With all the space under the bed taken, where shall we put the psilocybin farm and home-made kahlua?
Shz, Mar 22 2006

       /where shall we put the psilocybin farm and home-made kahlua?/ Specially made nightstands.   

       /...I'm on the lamb / sp: lam   

       I must've been thinking about sheep when writing this...mmm, sheep. I gotta go. Be back in 2 min-
NotTheSharpestSpoon, Mar 22 2006

       + with dead leaves in the bed, who needs crumbs?   

       I trust the matress would be stuffed with pine cones. +
Tanned Black, Mar 22 2006

       [+] for anything involving more plants indoors!
Texbinder, Mar 22 2006

       /I trust the matress would be stuffed with pine cones./   

       Ow. How about pine needles, instead. I know needles sound like they would hurt more than cones but not so. It's a crazy mixed up world out there, you're just gonna have to trust me on this one, [Tanned Black].
NotTheSharpestSpoon, Mar 22 2006

       Forgive me [NotTheSharpest Spoon], haven't actually seen a pine. Am serious.
Tanned Black, Mar 22 2006

       those damn pumps and grow lights are keeping me awake..... but I still like the idea.
xandram, Mar 22 2006

       "...until his ceiling hung with vines
and the walls became the world all around"
Maurice Sendak, "Where the Wild Things Are"

       Hops might be a good choice of vine. Very pretty, and the scent of the flowers is meant to aid restful sleep.
spidermother, Mar 23 2006

       All good clean fun until you wake up with a nasty case of aphids...
DrCurry, Mar 23 2006

       /...haven't actually seen a pine.//- [TannedBlack]   

       If you want, send me an e-mail of your address (or your choice of place) and I'll send you a pine cone and maybe some needles (pine, of course). This isn't a joke, I think it would be cool to be able to share the feel and scent of a real pine cone with someone that hasn't experienced it before.
NotTheSharpestSpoon, Mar 23 2006

       Actually just checked out the pictures on the net. The smell I believe I know from all these "pine fresh" products that I use daily. Ironic that you would buy guava and i would buy pine. Our postal service not the most reliable.
Tanned Black, Mar 23 2006

       "Pine fresh" does not really equal real pine just as "guava scent" probably does not equal gauva. But if you want, the offer still stands.
NotTheSharpestSpoon, Mar 23 2006

       Try to include as many tiny insects as possible on that jet-setting pine cone.
Texticle, Mar 24 2006

       Mean [Texticle], mean. Send me the pine and send [Texticle] the insects.
Tanned Black, Mar 24 2006


       Didn't she ride naked on a horse eating chocolate or somethin'?
NotTheSharpestSpoon, Mar 24 2006

       Perhaps a version of this bed could be outfitted with vines of roses, too. It'd be worth avoiding the thorns to have the incredible fragrance and sweetness of the flowers...
Terrie, Jul 24 2010

       Spiders. It will attract spiders. Many spiders.   

       For those who like spiders, this would be good.
8th of 7, Jul 24 2010

       Only if it has an owl cage
Voice, Nov 08 2011


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